Ambient Metal

Blosse – Nocturne Review

Blosse – Nocturne Review

“Earlier this year, our Angry Metal Overlord declared on Twitter that he was ‘done with atmospheric anything for a long time, but particularly black metal… Everything sounds the same and no one has any ideas.’ Now, your good pal Doomy cut his teeth on atmospheric black metal like Wolves in the Throne Room and Agalloch, so this was heresy to my eyeballs.” Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the bored.

Vesperith – Vesperith Review

Vesperith – Vesperith Review

Throughout the ages, many are the writers of these ancient halls who have remarked upon metalcore bands whose promotional materials lurk deep within that bogs of our storage facility masquerading as something else altogether. Many are those who have excitedly snatched up and absconded with a rare unsupervised melodeath promo only to realize, to their endless despair, that the joke is on them. As a relative newcomer, I knew to beware of this phenomenon, but I didn’t count on the surprising number of ambient bands whose promotional teams might seek to do the same thing with black metal. You’d think I’d have learned by now – Vesperith’s self-titled debut marks the fourth time I’ve sat down to sample a not-black metal “black metal” album.” Sucker!

Karyn Crisis’ Gospel of the Witches – Covenant Review

Karyn Crisis’ Gospel of the Witches – Covenant Review

“Over four years ago, Karyn Crisis released Salem’s Wounds, the debut album of her new project, Gospel of the Witches. While I found it to be an overly long, lopsided album, it was still awesome to see Crisis return to making heavy music again, and I was eager to hear more from this project. Fast-forward to 2019, and the Gospel are down to a tight three-person line-up, with Crisis once again teaming up with husband Davide Tiso, who handles the guitar, bass, and songwriting this go-’round, rounded out by Skinlab drummer Fabian Vestod. With four years between albums, are we looking at a stronger, more concise Gospel?” Out of the crisis, into the coven.

Juggernaut – Neuroteque Review

Juggernaut – Neuroteque Review

“When you hear about certain genres, do you have an image that pops into your head? It’s not always fair, but the most obvious one is black metal. You just got an image of a corpsepainted weeboo hanging out in a dark forest. Boom. I’m a fucking magician. What about sludge? Did you see a backwoods redneck with a twelve-gauge and a six-pack? Sporting beards, greasy locks, and enough flannel to challenge Saskatchewan?” Not your hick uncle’s sludge.

Ancient Moon – Benedictus Diabolica, Gloria Patri Review

Ancient Moon – Benedictus Diabolica, Gloria Patri Review

“While we lowly contributors labor in vain teaching at Promo Bin Middle School, we put up with metalcore shitheads apathetically texting while we’re teaching and black metal nerds threatening to fight us over manga correctness. Meanwhile the quiet drone achievers spend their time fucking up the class average in both directions. Getting a student recommendation from the principal is a huge deal for class chemistry and can go both ways, either the biggest disappointment ever or a star pupil who will inspire generations to come. This was my concern when I saw ambient black metal group Ancient Moon stamped with the ‘editor’s recommendation’ tag.” Go straight to the Principality of Hell.