Deathless Legacy - Dance with DevilsWhat seems like a lifetime ago, I used to go to Niagara Falls with a bunch of people to ring in the New Year, celebrating endings and beginnings by paying way too much money for food, alcohol, and entry to things. One of many constants on this annual trip was visiting a haunted house which naturally occurred after a few refreshments. It was a good and unserious time, full of the jump-scares and villains anyone who’s dabbled in horror knows and loves, hates, or loves to hate. Deathless Legacy, to my ears, wants to capture this in musical form on their third full-length release Dance with Devils.

To continue milking my simile, Dance with Devils reminds me of the chainsaw the actor playing a character who was legally not Leatherface revved up near my inebriated posse: it’s completely and utterly toothless. Despite trying to sound like Death SS via their humble beginnings as a tribute to those guys, Deathless Legacy comes across more as a soporific Halloween-themed Nightwish, but with worse vocals. There are plenty of keyboards, and the tempos don’t generally get too lively. Sadly, “Monster Mash” may actually make for an apt comparison.

The Halloween shtick works best on “Heresy,” which tries to sound like what would happen if Epica retooled one of their simpler and shorter singles for a Treehouse of Horror special but only had about fourteen hours to rearrange and rerecord it. Given Epica’s proclivity for writing good poppy hooks, I can’t say “Heresy” is completely awful (Simone and friends are famous for a reason, after all), but this isn’t to be confused with glowing praise. Keyboardist Pater Blaurot puts on an adept performance throughout and is without a doubt Deathless Legacy’s strongest asset. The Hammond solo in “Lucifer” nails down a solid and fun late 70s vibe, and the otherwise boring “The Black Oak” gets a shot in the arm from a hilariously excessive Children of Bodom-esque outburst of keyboard shredding.

Deathless Legacy 2017

Given that I’ve committed to this bit now, let’s keep it going: the atmosphere of a haunted house pervades throughout Dance with Devils’s duration, but it hits upon the wrong experience inside of one. Instead of the spooked and entertained visitor, “Join the Sabbath” drags along with its excruciating vocal lines and calmative riffing and puts me in the shoes of a member of the janitorial staff, attending to my tedious chore while barely adequate background music plays through the speakers. “Devilborn” is born from a desire to make a Nightwish song with no personality and zero hooks, and vocalist Steva La Conhiala butchers the chorus by having vocals that attempt to soar but, channeling a lazy Icarus, come crashing down without getting remotely close to the sun. “Creatures of the Night” sounds like an abortive attempt to recapture what happened on Jørn’s “Swing of Death” from Dracula, but as La Cinhiala doesn’t have the chops to sing convincingly, she can’t really over-sing either and instead resorts to a God-awful shriek-scream when her one-note monotony needs to be pushed to 5 instead of 3. Predictably, a good keyboard solo is the only part worth paying attention to in this tune.

I cannot recommend Dance with Devils to anyone. The production is uninteresting and boilerplate; having a detailed opinion on it would be tantamount to a food critic intensely reviewing saltine crackers. Much like how Rob Zombie’s idiotic take on Halloween shot itself in the foot, tripped, and was promptly impaled on a pitchfork, Deathless Legacy’s shockingly incompetent take on Death SS and horror-rock, in general, does little more than consigning itself to the ash-heap of wantonly irritating rubbish. Michael Myers was terrifying in the original Halloween because it wasn’t clear why he was wandering around murdering everyone. In this sense, Deathless Legacy may be considered terrifying too, because I have no idea why anyone would willingly put out something this boring. In a conclusion fitting of Halloween, a few shots have been fired at Dance with Devils and now it’s about to promptly disappear…from my playlist, anyway.


Rating: 0.5/5.0
DR: 7 | Format Reviewed: 160 kbps mp3
Label: Scarlet Records
Websites: deathlesslegacy.it | facebook.com/deathlessmetal
Releases Worldwide: January 27th, 2017

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  • AlphaBetaFoxface

    Very happy that “shtick” has become widely accepted as a usable term in review columns across the net.

    As for this shtick, I’ll be giving it a pass. Can’t say I didn’t expect more punishment just before January came to a close.

  • Dhhgh

    Damn, that’s a shame. That album cover is dope.

    • Monsterth Goatom

      Yes, Papa Emeritus III would approve.

  • Westpaceagle

    “Rob Zombie’s idiotic take on Halloween shot itself in the foot, tripped, and was promptly impaled on a pitchfork” God bless you. Rob Zombie had his moments making a few catchy pop songs. His only qualification to make horror movies apparently was that his name is zombie. His movies are utterly awful.

  • André Snyde Lopes

    When the devil wants to dance with you, you better say never, because a dance with the devil might last you forever.

  • Better than sum 41

  • gerard espinosa

    I am tempted to like Amaranthe more than this record…

  • Wilhelm

    Guitars sound like they used a plug in for distortion and drums sound programmable. I’m not particularly smitten by this, but I actually like the female vocals and don’t think the song is half bad, given that it had better production and the song was developed a bit more. The singer can certainly use her non-soprano vocals to sound more eccentric and avant garde, which is the direction I would advise this band to go.

  • Eldritch Elitist

    Well I don’t altogether hate it, but that embedded track was totally dull. I got to the end of the chorus before realizing “oh, I guess that was supposed to be the chorus.”

    Man, Scarlet Records really puts out some trash. Makes me nervous for the new Cellador.

    • Diabolus_in_Muzaka

      It’s easy to not hate at first, but when you have to listen to it about ten times through it really wears down your patience. Fifty-two minutes of what you described and worse is basically the record.

    • [not a Dr]

      Some of those kids movies have awesome songs…
      Helvetica! Helvetica!
      Helvetica BLACK!!!!!

  • Kill The King

    Wow. Lowest score I’ve seen on here.

    • GardensTale

      Look up Project Theory. You can hate me later

      • Grymm

        Don’t forget Tetragrammacide!

        • Kill The King

          Ouch. A DR of 0 AND a 0.0/5.0!!

  • Ugo Poifol

    You guys are all piling on this band, and I agree it’s not good, but… 0.5 ?

    I’d take Deathless Legacy over Akoma any day of the week. It’s just dull and uninspired. Other than that’s it’s pretty listenable.

    At any rate the guitars don’t sound like a midi track, as found on the Akoma record, and the vocal performance is kinda interesting (based on the embedded track).

  • Grymm

    Rob Zombie utterly defiled the Halloween franchise.

    And this music is bad. Not 0.5 bad (more like 1.5), but still bad.

  • beurbs

    The vocals are definitely awful, but to my ear only one notch below the creaky trash that Pain of Salvation is trying to pass off as singing.

  • I have to say that judging by the embedded track, this really isn’t that bad. The vocals have an interesting tone that I find quite appealing. I don’t think the music is anything worse than a million other bands out there. Some of the other tracks may have some rough edges, I don’t know I haven’t listened to them, but comparing the embedded track to other bands in the genre it probably sits somewhere in the middle. Regardless, it’s not my type of music anyway so I won’t be buying it. There is some truly awful stuff out there, but this is at least competent. I do agree though that it’s not a good idea to make Nightwish songs with no personality or hooks, as Nightwish do a pretty good job of that already.

    • jersey devil

      I agree with you. This is not my thing, but its not as terrible sounding as the 0.5 score indicates.

  • Carlos Marrickvillian

    Awesome 0.5 reviews are my favourites I have to and can’t wait to listen!

  • a glas o’ milk

    Very good review! Couldn’t resist listening to the embedded track. Aside from it lacking everything that makes actualy horror metal good, it also embodies everything I can’t stand about FFM these days: a painfully generic, symphonic wasteland of a song, that is held vapid and nondescript enough for the singer to chew up the scenery in the most obnoxious way possible. And I have no clue how this gets 8/10s in other magezines.

  • a glas o’ milk

    Very good review! Couldn’t resist listening to the embedded track. Aside from it lacking everything that makes actual horror metal good, it also embodies everything I can’t stand about FFM these days: a painfully generic, symphonic wasteland of a song, that is held vapid and nondescript enough for the singer to chew up the scenery in the most obnoxious way possible, while the music poses no threat to her “acting” by making sure to be as unmemorable and flat as possible. And I have no clue how this gets 8/10s in other magazines.

  • a glas o’ milk

    Good review! To me, the embedded track perfectly embodies whats wrong with FFM in my opinion: a generic, symphonic wasteland of a song, that is held vapid enough for an overacting singer to chew up the scene. This song comes without any flair or memorable melodies. And the piano melodies are just obnoxious. It’s as if this is a song made for a throwaway children’s movie to be screened on Halloween or something. Presuming that the rest of the album is just like that I am baffled at the fact, that this gets 8/10s in other magazines…

    • Diabolus_in_Muzaka

      This glass of milk gets it!

    • Meriyas

      This to me is what you would get out of a symphonic metal generator. Push it through with the default choices for vocals, guitars, drums and production sound then add keyboard (synth sound) to the Melody section to hold it all together.

      I’m pretty sure you could create that embedded track with the samples given to you from that music making software that came in Nutri Grain boxes at some point.