Intöxicated // Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl
Rating: 3.5/5.0 — Speeding with the Devil.
Label: Hells Headbangers Records
Websites: Facebook.com/Intoxicated-official | MySpace.com/Intoxicated
Release Dates: WW: 2013.05.14

intoxicated - album coverLike your speed metal served up fast, loud and dirty with a Lemmy-like grunt? How about dripping with Venom? Like their English counterparts, Intöxicated‘s Germanic brand of metal unleashes ten tons of pent-up instrumental and lyrical debauchery and intends to raise eyebrows and drop jaws. In other words it’s heavy as fuck, uncompromisingly raw and you’ll either love it or be disgusted by it. Reminding me of a mixture of Sodom (during their speed metal days), Motörhead, Venom and a more recent find Satan’s Wrath, this Jack Daniel’s soaked album is Intöxicated‘s first attempt at a full-length following on from two earlier EP releases. Never having heard of Intöxicated prior to Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl, but seeing that they’re signed to Hells Headbangers, and catching sight of their over-the-top track titles I grabbed this promo with zero expectation and mostly just a heaped serving of pure, unadulterated morbid curiosity.

Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl kicks off with an extract from the 1967 film ‘The Masque of the Red Death’, loosely based on Poe’s poem of the same name. You’re ominously told that ‘If a god of love and life ever did exist… he is long since dead. Someone… something, rules in his place‘ and right then and there you’re dumped into the grimy underworld of “Sex Drinks Satan”. That song title alone sums up the lyrical content of this album in a nutshell – sex, booze and Satan are pretty much where it’s at. The track has an aggressively gritty tone, the guitars rock and Äc’s drums decimate, galloping along in a rock ‘n roll, Motörhead-ish kind of way. Vocally, Löuie has a throaty, gravelly vocal style that’s rough and unpolished and holds more than a little similarity to cult icon Lemmy.

The following tracks dish up more of the same, the lyrics are Venomous, catchy and sleazy and the rhythm guitar work provides a sturdy, fun backbone for El Ranchö’s ripping solos that scream out for your attention in “Suffering For Löve”, “Crush Your Local Disco” and “Slutanic Speedmetal”. Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl is a massive piss-up that rocks balls-out hard from the get-go and it’s only when you hit Intöxicated‘s damn fine cover of “The Chase Is Better Than The Catch” paying homage to their muse that things slow down just a notch.

intoxicated - band photoFuzzy distortion and amateur sounding mixing and production, that may well have taken place in a dingy bar room over a bottle of Jacks, do nothing to hide the lightning speed of the guitars, the drums played at full-throttle and the thundering bass. These are very clearly the focus of this recording and it works well with Löuie’s vocal style. You’re going to need to crank this baby up to full ball though if you want to scrape through the grit to truly appreciate Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl‘s shabby lyrics.

This is the kind of metal that makes driving fun – It’s loud, it’s rocking and best of all it’s fucking fast! Röck ‘n Roll Hellpatröl is by no means original, it’s a clear-cut case of hero-worship but it’s done with authenticity and it’s done well. And all that’s left to say is that with track names like “Slutanic Speedmetal”, “Metal Porno Slut” and “Lock Up Your Daughters” you must have a vague idea of what you’re getting yourself into…

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  • KingKuranes

    That’s some album cover.

  • DAT cover art. One can only hope it’s “ironic”.

  • hubcapiv

    Indeed. Really cries out for a digital-only release.

    Thank Belial it didn’t get a 4.5. Hate to see that win Record o’ the Month and be the site backdrop.

  • Javier Vázquez

    My eyes bleed with covers like this one.

  • Looks like the promo shot for the new reality series “Teen Wolf”, only on A&E.

  • I’ve had this album in constant rotation since I bought it (two hours ago). It’s so fucking good. It’s like everything awesome about Motorhead mixed with everything great about Kill Em All-era Metallica (bonus: their drummer knows how to play his instrument).