“While I’ve certainly found many that have piqued my interest, few do it the way Archgoat does it. Fortunately, Portuguese trio Necrobode apparently heard my prayers and answered them with their Sob o Feitiço do Necrobode debut. Unfortunately, while this certainly scratched an itch, they still have a ways to go before they usurp their primary influence.” Goat with a bullet.
“What’s black and white and re(a)d all over? A war metal cover made out of newspapers! Stupid joke, but I bet you smiled anyway. Good news for all of you goat/Satan fans out there, Crurifragium are here to ensure you never smile again. Born of an unholy union between members of Demoncy, Astraes Pestis, and Warpvomit, these Seattleites bear all the triple-6 markings of a devil-worshiping crew looking to hail Lucifer in the best(ial) of ways.” Satan.
“Let’s be honest. The internet has simultaneously made everything better while absolutely fucking ruined it. Yes, we can get music and movies instantly, order pizza online, and buy embarrassing shit like hemorrhoidal cream without handing someone money face to face. At the same time, any mystery about life has been sucked out of our consciousness like an effeminate Brad Pitt in Interview With A Vampire chomping on some pale, lame white girl.” The internetz are for porn (and butt balm).
