“Though Germany’s Full Assault has been around for over fifteen years, I’ve never heard of them. I was even surprised they’ve never been reviewed before in these halls. But that might just be the lack of a label. Until now. Their Iron Shields debut, Dying World, is here with neothrash tendencies that combine a Crisix-like vocal approach with At the Gates thrashery.” Assault and BATT-ER-Y!
“I’d be a fool for not giving Almost Dead some credit for not giving two fucks what anyone thinks of their straightforward and sometimes strange style. That said, Destruction Is All We Know is the oddest album of them all—no doubt with some help from dial and toggle man Zac “Friend o’ the Blog” Orhen.” Odd Fellows warchest.
“Brazil’s Blackning have been producing concise neo-thrash records for nearly a decade. After a six-year hiatus, this quartet is back with their third album, Awakening Rage. As with so many thrash greats, will this third offering be the band’s epic masterpiece? Or will it be forgotten like so many others before it?” Third time’s the harm.
“Transgressive strikes me as a novel melding of post-Endorama Kreator and Judicator (tragically disbanded in 2020; R.I.P.). The latter influence comes as no surprise, as both guitarist/vocalist Alicia Cordisco and guitarist Joshua Payne are Judicator alums. Cordisco has an extremely distinct style of writing lead guitar melodies, which translate over to Transgressive in a work of black magic.” Raging transgression.
“I love to hear a band adjust their sound slightly and deliver a better product than the previous record. Vox Populi is utterly unmemorable. So, when I grabbed the thrashy Exile, I was concerned. But seconds into the opener, ‘Victims of Conquest,’ all doubt faded.” Vicious Intent.
“Continuing the trend of covering things I don’t normally cover, I traveled at the speed of light metal to Barcelona, where I encountered an angry, ‘roided-out shark wearing nothing but bullet belts and cargo khakis that barely contained his quads. His name is Fred, but his friends and enemies just call him Red, for short. My first encounter with Red looked much like the scenery depicted to your left. Specifically, there were many explosions, gunshots, cacophonies of glass and cigarette-stained plastic shrapnel, and the sweet sound of skulls succumbing to ruthless whirlwinds of ignited ammunition.” Blood in the mortar.
“Between threats of violence and comparisons of bicep circumference, a blessed soul shared the album art to Tymo’s second full-length The Art of a Maniac in the AMG group chat. I knew then I had to have it. It evokes the very best of over-the-top 80s thrash album covers, complete with a comically sinister figure in the foreground (in this case evil Bob Ross with his very own shoulder-Kuato), a post-apocalyptic cityscape in the background, and more vibrant colors than a Lisa Frank trapper keeper. I’d made the right call though, when I learned that these Alberta-bound Canucks not only walk the walk but talk the talk, contributing another mighty slab of unrelenting party-thrash to the never-ending thrash revival.” Ross fight.
“Prestige are a Finnish thrash band with a really, really awful name. They’re not a new act either. They were around at the tail end of the 80s thrash heyday, releasing their debut way back in 1989. According to their bio this earned them the distinction of being “one of Finland’s very first thrash metal bands.” They managed two followup releases, the last of which coming in 1992, before going into a Winter Soldier-like cryofreeze. They reformed in 2020 and now we get their first album in 29 years, Reveal the Ravage.” Thrash redemption.
“Since Steel‘s clammy, hairy hand forced me to write for this illustrious establishment, I’ve noticed a trend. The trend is the inconsistency of thrash releases. It’s like the entire genre gets together as one unit of foul-mouthed dinosaurs, balding dads, and pizza-hungry horror enthusiasts to decide when to release albums. They sit around chugging Mylanta, Steel Reserve, and Truly, talking their trade and comparing solos. After evaluating the recorded material at this annual meeting, they’ll make a decision. The decision this year? No releases. Who made the decision? No one really knows. At this point, everyone’s puking from overdoing it on alcohol and stomach acid. At next year’s meeting, the verdict will flip. Or, so everyone hopes.” Thrash rebels.
“This is year two of Covid and we’re still discovering new ways in which the pandemic is altering the way we live. For instance, we’ve received multiple 2021 promos for Funeral Hymns, the sophomore release from Chicago thrash metal band Bloodletter, but Metal Archives and Bandcamp say it was released in September of 2020. I’m sure we will have more situations like this in the next couple of months. In fact, my review for next week is in the exact same boat. Not knowing who to trust, I’ve decided to trust the only person that I can trust: yours truly.” Blood can’t be dated.
