GardensTale

Will be destroying crappy nu-metal and praising crappy prog until the sky dies.
Tomorrow’s Eve – Mirror of Creation III – Project Ikaros Review

Tomorrow’s Eve – Mirror of Creation III – Project Ikaros Review

“I must admit, I get a bit nervous reviewing a part 3 of anything without experiencing part 1 and 2 beforehand. It’s like watching the final chapter of a movie trilogy without knowledge of what happened before. But since storyline is nearly always a secondary feature in music, I’ll make an exception for Tomorrow’s Eve. The progressive German quintet has been around for a while, 20 years in fact, but the last decade has been spent not releasing anything.” George R.R. Martin metal?

Ruff Majik – Seasons Review

Ruff Majik – Seasons Review

“Located at the very tip of the African continent, South Africa may win the prize for ‘Most Accurate Country Name,’ challenged only by the uniformly low and flat Netherlands. Metal, however, is not what the nation is generally known for (apartheid and the guy who directed District 9 both rank higher, for instance.) In our extensive archives, only 9 articles bear a ‘South African Metal’ tag. Until today, that is, because Ruff Majik come forth from the shadows of Pretoria, the South African capital.” South Africa rising.

Septic Tank – Rotting Civilisation Review

Septic Tank – Rotting Civilisation Review

“In the mid-90’s, Cathedral was turning into a household name in the realms of British doom. The steaming, sleazy groove of the quartet was best described as the midway point of Black Sabbath, Clutch and Mötorhead, and has seen its fair share of progeny (like The Necromancers, for instance.) Unbeknownst to many, the band had a side project simmering away in the form of Septic Tank, which was often mentioned between the members but was kicked down the road as much as that novel you intend to write sometime. Five years after Cathedral’s dissolution, the side project has sprung back to life with three of its original four members, including bassist Scott Carlson, guitar player Gaz Jennings and vocalist Lee Dorrian.” We’re getting the cesspool back together!

Eagle Twin – The Thundering Heard (Songs of Hoof and Horn) Review

Eagle Twin – The Thundering Heard (Songs of Hoof and Horn) Review

“Mythology has always been a popular subject of metal. Of these, Norse legend is the first and foremost, to the point of cliche, by anything ranging from cheesy power to pummeling death metal. But Sumerian and Egyptian have their fans as well, and even a few Asian and South-American wellsprings have proven fruitful. One underused source of ancient stories is that of Native American culture, a loose collection of mythologies of the many tribes that once roamed the North-American continent, which often worshipped the great beasts of the plains and the elements that provided for them. Eagle Twin, consisting of singer/guitarist Gentry Densley (Iceburn) and drummer Tyler Smith, sought to correct this lack of appreciation with the Native American inspired The Thundering Heard (Songs of Hoof and Horn).” Tribal thunder.

Realms of Vision – Through All Unknown Review

Realms of Vision – Through All Unknown Review

“Archetypes of Californian stoner Fu Manchu have inspired a ton of followers. After all, the lighthearted, straightforward fuzz rockers have a style that does well on any stage, in any form, and is easily duplicated even by less experienced musicians. But picture a saloon full of personifications of these fun-loving cowboys. Imagine them laughing, drinking beer and playing cards in good nature. Then a silence falls as the door swings open. A gruff figure in the opening, clad in black, eyes the room wearily, a crumpled cigarette protruding from dry lips in a scarred and stubbled face. The silence holds as he approaches the bar and orders a whiskey in a dark-brown voice. That fellow is Realms of Vision, a new face in town, armed with an eight-pounder called Through All Unknown.” Riff slingers and hell raisers.

Fátima – Moaner Review

Fátima – Moaner Review

“As devoted readers, you may recall the Big Hoss himself released an expanded and updated article filled to the brim with advice for bands attempting to prostrate themselves before us. The first of the undoubtedly approaching tidal wave of bands that worship the article and obey it like scripture is Fátima, a French doom metal band that actually went and sent us lossless FLAC files, a move that will set an important precedent among hopefuls knocking down our door.” Give us your finest sound files!

Eldritch – Cracksleep Review

Eldritch – Cracksleep Review

“It’s always more difficult to review a band with an established discography when you’ve never heard of them in the first place. Such is the case with Eldritch, a prolific Italian power metal outfit with a whopping 11 albums under their belt since their 1991 inception. Allegedly, their earlier works contained such influences as Metallica, Machine Head, and Pantera, but 17 years and a few line-up changes can do a lot to a band (right, Metal Magic?) In case of Eldritch, their experience has pushed power and progressive tendencies to the forefront, settling on a sound from the neighborhood of Angra for their new release, the curiously titled Cracksleep.” Eldritch non-elitist.

Felskinn – Mind Over Matter Review

Felskinn – Mind Over Matter Review

“Let us put on the hat of the elitist for a moment. What separates us from the mainstream pleb? When it comes to extreme metal, the answer is obvious. No mainstream music is so dense, complex and abrasive. Hit lists rarely contain tracks that actively, overtly work to create discomfort and repulsion. When it comes to less obviously anti-commercialism, though, the differences become less pronounced, and a multitude of heavy metal bands have indeed been part of what was considered hit music, back in the glorious ’80s. Felskinn tries to appeal to the hit chart-sensitive among the population while recognizing that classic metal doesn’t embody widely accepted characteristics anymore.” Taste the Felskinn.

Vile Creature – Cast of Static and Smoke Review

Vile Creature – Cast of Static and Smoke Review

“Why do we love music of such a harsh, ugly aesthetic? Once, during my college years, I was asked this question by a project coach. It wasn’t the first time I heard the question, but it was the most memorable, as for the first time it wasn’t asked as an attack but of genuine interest. I found I did not have a satisfying answer. “It has a furious energy, a certain power that gives me a rush for all its darkness,” was the best I could say. But at the time, I did not yet listen to doom metal, and if I had, it might have complicated my search for a genuine answer further. Because how would I describe the appeal to bands like Vile Creature, a duo who makes deliberate, hideous music that is slow and steady.”