Kenstrosity

Destroying AMG's metal cred from within.
Weltfremd – Nachwelt Review

Weltfremd – Nachwelt Review

“One of the great things about reviewing music is the opportunity to drag an underground artist from the depths of the metalverse into the blinding light of day. Sometimes that pans out well for us and, by extension, the artist. Sometimes we end up regretting our choice. The worst feeling in the world as a reviewer, especially one like me who has never written a piece of music in his life, is to say, ‘this album sucks.’ That feeling intensifies when the judged is but a singular human being bravely reaching out and handing their precious work over to us.” Art is pain.

Essence of Datum – Spellcrying Machine Review

Essence of Datum – Spellcrying Machine Review

“Instrumental metal has been a difficult branch for me to get into. A big part of why I got into metal is due to the wild dynamics offered by a human voice (and in one particular case, a coffee grinder). But there are always exceptions to the rule that eventually break the rule entirely. In my case, the first band to pop my “vocals or bust” bubble was Nightwish, whose instrumental-only rendition of Dark Passion Play is so compelling I ended up preferring it over the standard edition. Then I discovered Sleep Terror, a fantastic instrumental tech-death/surf/funk band you all owe it to yourselves to investigate. From there I discovered Echopraxia, a ghost/supernatural themed instrumental metal act, and now I’ve stumbled upon Essence of Datum, an instrumental melodic prog-death couplet from Minsk.” Voices don’t carry.

Wizard Rifle – Wizard Rifle Review

Wizard Rifle – Wizard Rifle Review

“What is a ‘wizard rifle,’ exactly? It is a rifle that shoots magic missiles? Perhaps a rifle that spawns wizards propelled to impossible velocities (which does not bode well for said wizards, I suppose)? Maybe it’s something simpler, like a rifle made specifically for wizards that stores itself magically inside their hats. Or it could be something more complex, such as a rifle whose first shot pops out a smaller wizard who holds his/her/their own miniaturized wizard rifle, and so on.” Spell spewing.

Yer Metal Is Olde: Incantation – Mortal Throne of Nazarene

Yer Metal Is Olde: Incantation – Mortal Throne of Nazarene

“I am likely the least qualified individual here when it comes to the ways of Olde and yet, here I stand, holding in trembling hands my second YMIO article for the year. Rest easy, weary traveler, for this isn’t another block of top-shelf sympho-cheese. You see, I do listen to other genres, unlike some people (ahem, Twelve).” Well, he’s not wrong.

Book of Wyrms – Remythologizer Review

Book of Wyrms – Remythologizer Review

“Fuzz and fantasy are the Virginian quartet’s main exports from Remythologizer. You can expect groovy riffs explored at a leisurely pace, trippy synths twinkling and swooshing throughout a pastel wonderland of mythic necropolises. Frontwoman Sarah Moore-Lindsey plants a darkly serene character into these dead gardens, with a touch of whiskey flavoring her laid back approach.” The early book gets…THE WYRM!

Tarchon Fist – Apocalypse Review

Tarchon Fist – Apocalypse Review

“What? You thought Victorious was gonna be the only metal band we reviewed here with bright colors and dinosaurs in their album art? Fools! The lot of ye! Tarchon Fist, an Italian heavy metal quintet formed in 2005, demands representation in the land of outlandish tapestries bursting with muscular sword-dudes and rampant nonsense. I summoned Apocalypse from the post-apocalyptic wasteland that is August’s promotional dump site because I believed the metal deities wouldn’t permit such artwork were it not for the righteous wares forged therein.” Fist of the Past.

Black Passage – The Veil Review

Black Passage – The Veil Review

“Every now and again we at AMG receive promo that defies genre classification. Out of those, one or two make us crazy trying to decide whether we even like it or not. This review marks the first time I get to experience said phenomenon firsthand. Black Passage, a “metalcore” quintet out of Bay Area, CA, are releasing their debut LP The Veil at the tail end of July.” Pigeons without holes.

Akantha – Baptism in Psychical Analects Review

Akantha – Baptism in Psychical Analects Review

“‘There are few things in this world as pleasant as raw black metal.’ What foolish KenWords those were. I was young then, impressionable and naive. Akantha has since extinguished the innocent light from my eyes. In my newfound wisdom, I now believe that raw black metal is one of the ugliest things in this world.” Ugly is as ugly does.