Firstly, yes, I see the classic Playstation game, Medieval badly reflected in that craptastic album art, and that makes me more kindly disposed toward the album. And Hessian seem to be my kind of jam, being retro metallers from the wilds of Portland, Maine with a bit of swagger and Devil may care attitude.” Steel gets Medieval on yer ass.
“Does Grier have a problem? No, motherfucker, he doesn’t. If he had a problem, there would be a new review, interview, or career introspective on King every week here at AMG. But, that’s not the case, is it? So, for all you sonsabitches out there that think I have a problem, I’m gonna prove to you that I’m not crazy. That’s right, I’m going to review Carriage’s non-King-related debut record, Visions. This album is so far from King Diamond—and Mercyful Fate, for that matter—that you’re all gonna be proud of Old Man Grier. So, does us all a favor and chill.” The Intervention of Kings is upon us!
![Ancient Empire – The Tower [Things You Might Have Missed 2017]](https://www.angrymetalguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/22789029_1960975857509748_2001782068802902284_n-768x768.jpg)
“When I was a wee swordbearer in the northern taiga with fewer years under my belt and not enough Jørn Lande in my life, I lived on a metal diet comprised almost solely of Freedom Call, Power Quest, Dark Moor, and their ilk. I was absolutely convinced that other than Kamelot, there was really nothing coming out of the US that could interest me. Then, a couple years later, I was slapped silly by Pharaoh, Nevermore, and Twisted Tower Dire.” Murican power metal – it’ll slap ya.
![Blazon Stone – Down in the Dark [Things You Might Have Missed 2017]](https://www.angrymetalguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/Blazon-Stone-Down-in-the-Dark-01-768x774.jpg)
“Though pirate metal has branched out in recent decades, Running Wild’s bloody cutlass is still the measuring stick for wannabe scalawags. Blazon Stone defer to the captain publicly, but in quiet plan mutiny. Steal the dread captain’s ship and plunder the high seas with it? Nonsense! No one can best the the captain… can they? Blazon Stone certainly try.” There can be 3 pirate-themed metal bands when 2 are dead.
![Palantír – Lost Between Dimensions [Things You Might Have Missed 2017]](https://www.angrymetalguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/a2650058153_10-768x768.jpg)
“Stormspell Records has rocketed to the top of my list of favorite labels this year, with a case of such enjoyable and varied heavy/power metal pyrotechnics as Blazon Stone, Grimgotts, Númenor, Ancient Empire, Nocturnal Alliance, Raging Fate, Dream Tröll, and perhaps my favorite of the lot, the subject of this review: Sweden’s Palantír.” Gaze into the orb, and you’ll find AMG gazing back.
“Somewhere on a wind swept beach in a far-flung corner of the Pacific Ocean was a buried treasure chest. That chest was filled with all the riffs Running Wild had yet to use but wanted to keep from their scurvy competition. And there it sat for decades in it’s sandy repose, unknown to all but Rock n’ Rolf. That was until upstart Italian buccaneers Silverbones jacked the riff-booty, leaving empty bottles of Limoncello as their calling cards.” YAARR’s revenge?
“Newcastle (upon Tyne [UK]) based Horrified released their debut about a year and a half ago, and the AMG staff collectively shrugged. A throwback death metal record with some neat riffs and an authentic sound, it lacked in both originality and execution, and was summarily dismissed by yours truly. But wise old man of the AMG staff, Al Kikuras saw something in the band, a certain rough charm and attitude that’s missing in the majority of retro-death.” Al knows retro-death.
“Tolkien metal is actually a thing. For those that haven’t come across it prior to now, it’s a subgenre of black metal that’s supposedly more atmospheric and ambient with lyrics entirely based around Tolkien’s works. Summoning are the forerunners of the genre, but it looks like they have a little competition in the shape of Serbian band Númenor.” Nerds. Be. Raging (and LARPING).
