“Long gone are the days of demo releases being the lifeblood of underground metal. With the tape trading days of circulating a raw and rough cut demo to create word of mouth buzz and build street cred a thing of the past, and the digital age having firmly taken over, the format has become a fading relic in the modern metal landscape.” But this putrid gem might just take you back to the rancid demo days of yore.
“I wasn’t aware how much I needed my ass kicked by some epic, trve metal of the olden style until said ass kicking was delivered by Utah’s Visigoth and their debut, The Revenant King. Their mega hefty, uber manly metal owes a lot to ancestors like Grand Magus, Argus, Sinister Realm and of course, Manila Road, and naturally, they specialize in long, bulky odes to swords, battle and honor (“Oathcore” for short).” The barbarians were at the gates and they left a giant wooden beer. Let’s go get it!
“Never heard of Serdce? I can’t blame you. The Belarussian prog-death group has been tramping around the metalsphere in undeserved obscurity since 1997 and Timelessness is the fourth(!) LP to spill from their obscenely talented hands and the first to be released by the metal messiahs at Blood Music.” Did you miss this slab of prog-death in 2014? Well, fix that in 2015!
“I’m just going to come out and say it. I enjoyed Dimmu Borgir’s big-assed Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia. Yep, I said it. Haters be a hatin’ but its elements of bombastic orchestration and “beauty and the beast” vocals introduced a balance of demonic and angelic qualities that expanded on a style bands like Emperor and Limbonic Art had/have nurtured for years.” Don’t hate the keyboards, hate the player.
“If you’ve clicked on over to Angry Metal Guy and need an introduction to Venom, you’re probably at the wrong web site, lady. My obsession with this band started at the ripe old age of eight or so and has never really faltered….” The original Lords of Chaos are back to prove…something. Are they still at war with Satan, or just yelling at kids to get off their lawn?
“Cast your minds back to a time when metal music was not cool. Nay, indeed, a time when metal was anathema to all that was considered to be “chic” and “in.” A time when your favorite bands were actually encouraged by the music industry to play slower, cut their hair, and write sensitive lyrics about their childhoods. Yes, this unfortunately really happened. Our new semi-irregular feature “90s Metal Weirdness” focuses on albums released between 1992 and 2001 and which we all probably would rather forget. But in the service of publicly shaming the musicians involved, we have pushed forward.” And how dare we accuse the Crown Prince of NWoBHM of weirdness? Oh, we dare, but it’s all very British and polite like.
“If there’s anything that can be gleamed about the giant web that is the world of heavy metal, it’s that you can always draw influence from outside of the genre’s comfort zone to provide a fresh flavor to the oftentimes stagnant scene. Whether it’s pulling from other sounds beyond metal, bringing in a new philosophical or religious slant, or simply injecting your culture into your sound, it’s pretty much guaranteed that, good or bad, you will be remembered.” Is Condor ready to be remembered?
“Except for AC/DC, few acts are as unchanging, predictable and satisfying as U.D.O. Since departing from Accept in 1996, Udo Dirkschneider has been a one man Germanic metal sweat shop, mass producing albums with startling regularity and consistency. While his style never strays far from what Accept did in their prime, the unsinkable lawn gnome of metal has made it his mission to keep the 80s sound alive.” Giving you exactly the same metal since the early 80s, Udo is prepared to give just a little more. He’s a giver…of metal.
“Believe it or not, we tend to research the bands we review here, even if it’s occasionally more tempting just to mash our palms against the keyboard for five hundred words, assign an arbitrary score, then knock off down to the pub. This week has, therefore, seen me listening to an unhealthy amount of the genre that discerning metalheads love to hate: djent (the ‘d’ is silent).” Djent is a challenging genre, but then again, a double album of material can make any genre challenging. We like challenges.
“Usurping the Throne of Disease gave me two things: one, a delightfully rotten piece of blackened death-crust (which, typing it out now, actually sounds more like a spicy appetizer than a genre); and two, a reason to move past my failed no-jerking-off New Year’s resolution and slave away at a review that will, inevitably, be given the ‘Quilted Northern’ treatment by my Great Overlord.” I like my crust blackened and radioactive with a side order of cold saw.
