“Not much is known about the mysterious entity Dead in the Manger. And by not much, I mean virtually fucking nothing. The band choose to remain anonymous for whatever reason, perhaps due to the overwhelming fame and fortune that comes with life in an underground band playing extreme metal.” Another band trying to be mysterious and kvlt. They’re only here so they don’t get fined.
“Usurping the Throne of Disease gave me two things: one, a delightfully rotten piece of blackened death-crust (which, typing it out now, actually sounds more like a spicy appetizer than a genre); and two, a reason to move past my failed no-jerking-off New Year’s resolution and slave away at a review that will, inevitably, be given the ‘Quilted Northern’ treatment by my Great Overlord.” I like my crust blackened and radioactive with a side order of cold saw.
“There are three things you need to know in regards to Raunchy: 1) I’ve had an unhealthy love affair with them since stumbling across Wasteland Discotheque back in 2008; 2) they have the most misleading band name ever; and 3) never say “can I get Raunchy?” when asking for their promo.” We call that a micro-aggression, and we only tolerate macro-aggressions at AMG. HR awaits!
“Caïna certainly aren’t your typical black metal band, they’re not Norwegian, Swedish, American or French as you would expect. In fact, Caïna is the labor of heartache by Englishman Andrew Curtis-Brignell and his band’s discography is all over the map.” Constantly changing and mutating, this act is very hard to pin down. But Madam X has many pins and a will to win.
“Historically I’ve not been awfully big on punk, particularly in its more melodic forms. More recently, though, I’ve been warming to the genre. I’ve always loved grindcore, am increasingly enjoying crust and hardcore, and the past year has seen me revisiting – and, swipe me, enjoying – The Offspring.” Looks like it’s time for an intervention at AMG. Now where are the spiked bats?
“Napalm Death, we meet again. For their last decade or so, these guys have been a model of uneventful consistency. Their notorious lineup changes seem to be a thing of the past (or perhaps not), and their last 4-5 albums have been damn solid. This is certainly a good thing for longtime Napalm fans, but it makes reviewing them increasingly redundant.” You might even say reviewing them is a bit of a…grind?
“Orden Ogan has a name that greatly irritates me, but they’ve been a positive force in Euro-power over the years with semi classics like Vale, Easton Hope and the very respectable To The End. What I always enjoyed about them was how effectively they could fuse the vintage sounds of countrymen Rage and Blind Guardian into something enjoyable and at least partially unique.” Love the player, hate the name. That’s just how it goes sometimes.
“A little confession: I chose to review the appallingly-titled 23 Acez sophomore effort in a bout of vindictive malice after grappling with a particularly hateful Spanish literature essay. I was pissed off and envisaged venting on a poor rock band just trying to make their way in the world.” We hate, because we care. Not about you, but other important stuff.
“Being my first review of 2015, I think it’s fitting that I wish all the AMGers out there a Happy New Year. May it be filled with joy! Conversely, I have two words for 2014: fuck you.” Before we embrace the shiny new year, Dr. A.M. Grier has to air some grievances. He also reviews some interesting black metal.
“How often do you think of an instrumental band that substitutes that wishful vocalist with the swooning leads of a viola? My guess is never. You never think of that. Well, the masterminds behind Sans Soleil thought about it for you.” My mom always says “if you have a viola, you have everything.”
