More lists for the list machine! The men who unwisely go by their real names, Mark Z. and L. Saunders boldly proclaim their best albums of 2018.
Archgoat
Goathammer – Ceremony of Morbid Destruction Review
“Goathammer’s name is a paradox. On one hand, it sounds metal as fuck. Goats are easily one of the most metal animals, while the word “hammer” conveys a sense of primal, brute force. Yet at the same time, it feels kind of generic. If someone were to hold a gun to my head and force me to come up with ten metal band names in two minutes, “Goathammer” would be right near the top of the list, along with “Death Trooper” and “Satanic Thimblefucker.” Goat with a bullet.
Witch King – Voice of the Ossuary Review
I remember when the term “blackened death metal” meant your standard meat-and-potatoes death metal seasoned with just the right selection of herbs, spices, and daemonic ash rubbed in to give it that extra zing. “The term meant brutality in spades, blasts upon blasts bombarding you like an overzealous kid during dodgeball at a standard Phys. Ed. class, and growls that dragged you into the bowels of Hell, sucking your soul as you sit there and smile as life ebbs from your very pores. Nowadays, though? “Blackened death metal,” more often than not, encapsulates anything from the above scenario to bells, whistles, choirs, sweep-picked arpeggios, and a kitchen sink or two. Thankfully, Rhode Island’s Witch King brought it back to basics with their debut full-length, Voice of the Ossuary.” Blackened witchery.
Archgoat – The Luciferian Crown Review
“Take a look at that cover and imagine for a second what sort of music album artwork like that might be trying to sell you. Can you hear those buzzsaws and blastbeats? Can you hear the imprecations against God, the divine order and all the fools that stand by it?” Can you judge this album by its cover? Eh, probably…
Inisans – Transition Review
“They say good things comes to those who wait. I’m not sure who “they” are in this situation – You? The silent cabal of shadow and influence puppeting our every step? The burger people? – but “they” are certainly shooting too low. If my band devoted nine years of blood, spit, and shit to a debut release, good wouldn’t be good enough. Thusly, we enter Transition. Dissatisfaction courses through the ranks of AMG’s death metal connoisseurs; a recent dearth of quality old school death metal offers Inisans a chance to catch their eye. It’s up to the Swedes to snatch the brass ring.” The mob demands death.
Morbosidad – Corona De Epidemia Review
“In their promo blurb, Morbosidad boast that all their lyrics are written in Spanish, a “direct descendant of the Latin tongue spoken by the crucifiers of Jesus.” That alone should tell you everything you need to know about the band. Turn the distortion to 11 and get out your crumpled Blasphemy shirts, here comes 33 minutes of bestial blackened death metal guaranteed to earfuck you into next week.” Ears are a gift and should be treated with respect.
Weregoat – Pestilential Rites of Infernal Fornication Review
“What do you get when you cross a werewolf with a goat? If you guessed “39 minutes of barbaric blackened death metal,” congratulations and welcome to a world where the only thing more bestial than the music is the sexual activity it describes.” Animal husbandry.
Crurifragium – Beasts of the Temple of Satan Review
“What’s black and white and re(a)d all over? A war metal cover made out of newspapers! Stupid joke, but I bet you smiled anyway. Good news for all of you goat/Satan fans out there, Crurifragium are here to ensure you never smile again. Born of an unholy union between members of Demoncy, Astraes Pestis, and Warpvomit, these Seattleites bear all the triple-6 markings of a devil-worshiping crew looking to hail Lucifer in the best(ial) of ways.” Satan.
Eastern Front – EmpirE Review
“War is hell. It’s also pretty metal. This defining aspect of the human condition has been touched upon by more bands than you can rattle your saber at. It’s even made its mark on black metal, as Eastern Front will be quick to remind you. Plundering the history books for wartime atrocities has inspired some ferocious work from Eastern Front before, and EmpirE rides that Panzer down a solid if unsurprising path.” Let’s blow stuff up!
