Aura Noir

Insulters – Metal Still Means Danger Review

Insulters – Metal Still Means Danger Review

“Do you smell that? No? Breath deeper? Now do you smell it? Nope, it wasn’t me or the dog. That is the flatulence of another year. Forced out the sphincter of 2016, 2017 promises to be better than the worm-ridden large intestine it was shat from. Actually, twenty-seventeen doesn’t promise shit.” Doc loves the smell of blackened sphincter in the mourning.

70,000 Tons of Metal Live Review

70,000 Tons of Metal Live Review

“I don’t agree with my dad on everything, but there’s one thing we do agree about: cruises are the best way to vacation. Free all-you-can-eat buffets, breezy tropical weather, alcohol and entertainment available everywhere, and – most importantly – you’re always within walking distance of your room, so you never have to worry about getting a DUI or throwing up in an Uber on your ride back to the Red Roof Inn. But a cruise with 60 metal bands and over 3,000 fans from all over the world, making a four day round-trip to Jamaica with bars that never close? That’s a whole different beast entirely!” In the Navy, you can rock the seven seas!

Frosthelm – The Endless Winter Review

Frosthelm – The Endless Winter Review

“I fucking love black-thrash, and if you don’t then I’m sorry about your inferior taste. My latest sample of the genre comes from Frosthelm, hailing from Minot, North Dakota of all places (coincidentally the same town as Ghost Bath – in case anyone still thought they were Chinese). Frosthelm are a quartet of self-confessed Dungeons & Dragons nerds who claim influences as broad as Metallica, Naglfar, and Dissection.” Put some Dakota in your dungeon and see how that suits ya!

Blindfisted – Blindfisted Review

Blindfisted – Blindfisted Review

“There is one problem I have with punk/crust/D-beat. It encourages me to fuck shit up. When done right, the music tempts me into driving 100 mph to work, marching into my boss’s office and beating the living shit out of him. While I obviously have some serious psychological issues here (particularly being that I am indeed my own boss), music like this sets my skin on fire and the only cure for this uncomfortable burning sensation is revolution, overthrow and apocalyptic destruction.” Apparently we found crust punk for the angry solo practitioner. Work your own hours and burn shit down.

Force of Darkness – Absolute Verb of Chaos and Darkness Review

Force of Darkness – Absolute Verb of Chaos and Darkness Review

“With spikes, skulls and Sarcophago as my top 3 interests on ChristianMingle.com, I was surprised I hadn’t already heard of Force of Darkness. Formed in 2002, this Chilean trio released a self-titled debut in 2006 and a second LP Darkness Revelation in 2010. I was somewhat familiar with bassist/vocalist Nabucodonosor III’s other band Hades Archer, whom I had discovered via the standard method of searching for naughty words on metal-archives.org, thus stumbling on their 2008 EP Penis Metal. As EPs go it was fairly average in both length and quality.” Two things we love at AMG are penis jokes and bad ESL album titles. Enjoy of deep verb.

Ava Inferi – Onyx Review

Ava Inferi – Onyx Review

Gothic metal, or as I’ve come to think of it, hot-babes-with-epic-pipes metal. I used to love it but admit to getting burned out on it over the last few years due to the over proliferation of these types of female fronted acts. Of course, some bands do it way better than others but it just seemed like there were a million generic, plastic imitations running around and I eventually washed my hands of the whole style. So when I was assigned the new Ava Inferi album, I didn’t have high expectations to say the least. Onyx is the third album by this Portugal based crew which features the guitar work and song writing of Rune Eriksen (Aura Noir) and the vocal stylings of Carmen Susana Simoes. Although these folks are usually classified as gothic/doom, there’s really no doom in their sound in the conventional sense. No crushing riffs, no mournful dirges. Instead, they strive to create a somber, melancholy feeling by playing sedately, with minimal aggression. While I wasn’t blown away by their previous material, this one managed to get under my skin and really grew on me. I must caution however, although I liked it more than expected, I get the feeling many metal minded individuals will not feel the same way.