Cellador

Paladin – Ascension Review

Paladin – Ascension Review

“In my early days of metal fandom, there was a period of roughly two years – spanning from the time I stumbled upon DragonForce,‘s Inhuman Rampage to when I began exploring Darkthrone‘s discography – where I listened to nothing except for power metal and thrash. During this period, as I worked on my sloppy renditions of “Eagle Fly Free” and “Battery” on a cheap Yamaha electric guitar my parents picked up at a department store, I had an epiphany: why the fuck hasn’t anyone mashed up the two best genres in the world?” One mash, coming up!

Skeletoon – They Never Say Die Review

Skeletoon – They Never Say Die Review

“Considering the prevalence of nostalgia culture in social media, I’m surprised that Richard Donner’s 1985 cult classic The Goonies hasn’t seen a significant surge in popularity. Seeing it today reminds me that the film was a perfect recreation of my wildest childhood fantasies of close-lurking adventure. Yes, there is a pirate ship loaded with treasure hiding underneath your hometown. Yes, you have to go down an extremely fun and extremely dangerous waterslide to get to it. Yes, you can steal a kiss from your older brother’s hot girlfriend, even if your older brother is an even hotter Josh Brolin. If there’s any musical genre in existence that’s all about crafting a similar sense of childlike wonder, it’s power metal; so, as lame as it is, a power metal concept album about The Goonies makes some sense.” Goo-nie-capped.

Helion Prime – Terror of the Cybernetic Space Monster Review

Helion Prime – Terror of the Cybernetic Space Monster Review

“In the past five or so years, the U.S. underground power metal scene has become explosively vibrant. Where a decade ago the only act that could hold a candle to its European contemporaries was Cellador, the past few years have seen American bands claiming my personal prize of Power Metal Album ov the Year. Arizona’s Ice Sword seems primed to secure the slot this year, and in previous years the honor was claimed by Cellador, Judicator, and, of course, Helion Prime.” Prime Cheddar or processed Velvetta?

Novareign – Legends Review

Novareign – Legends Review

“Risking sideways looks around the break room, I harbor an innate soft spot for DragonForce. You can say what you want about their incessant need to beat their frets to death, but it still resulted in some damn catchy songs. Plus, I was that kid who was way better at Guitar Hero than everyone else. DragonForce couldn’t repel more girls if they wore orthodontic headgear with a d20 strapped to it, so naturally Teenage Mutant Metal Wvrm loved them. Novareign clearly feel the same way.” Welcome to Wankville.

Stormage – Dead of Night Review

Stormage – Dead of Night Review

“I recently read an article stating cheese is good for you. Immediately I called up our promo list for March and scoured the piles of black metal releases for some suitable power metal. With Cellador spoken for (and spoken of), I grabbed what I hoped would be the next best thing: Dead of Night, the third album (but first in ten years, thus their anonymity) from Germanic power metallers Stormage. Which I pronounce the same way I say fromage, which of course is French for cheese.” When cheddar attacks.

Cellador – Off the Grid Review

Cellador – Off the Grid Review

“In January of 2007, I received one of the best packages of my teenage years, purchased with a Best Buy gift card I received for Christmas. The box contained two CDs: The Best of Led Zeppelin, and Cellador’s Enter Deception. While the former helped kickstart my affinity for classic rock, the latter, an uncharacteristically high quality American power metal record that did Euro-power better than most Euro-power bands, cemented my newfound love for the genre.” Best Buy always knows.