“Life’s a wild, fucking adventure that’s about as satisfying as it is annoying. For every high, there’s a massive low. For every milestone, there’s a setback. For every breakthrough, there are countless failures. Sometimes it gets to the point where all you remember from one day to the next is the bullshit. What does this have to do with Stormhammer and their sixth LP Welcome to the End? A hell of a lot.” Life is pain and power metal can be too.
“Known for its short summers and long, drawn out winters, New England is not the worst starting point for a winter-themed album. Fueled by isolation and frigid temperatures, 1476 hail from the infamous Salem, Massachusetts and their specialty is a mixture of art and stripped-down dark, atmospheric rock.” We didn’t land on 1476’s rock, it landed on us!
“35 years into their career, Metallica’s music is so ingrained in heavy metal’s DNA that writing about it objectively is almost impossible. Their albums were among the first I ever owned, and they were the first live show I ever saw (with Suicidal Tendencies and original-lineup Danzig opening!). In recent decades, I’ve cringed alongside the rest of you at the band’s various missteps, and rooted for them as they slowly reclaimed bits of their 1980s glory.” The frayed ends of Hardwired.
“AMG Himself likes to use helpful descriptors to mark band promos on the master spreadsheet so the staff knows what’s what. Having never heard of Arcana 13, my eyes were drawn to his cursory note describing them simply as “Ghost-core.” With my interest thusly piqued I gave Danza Macabra a spin and as advertised, it’s somewhat Ghost-y occult rock, but they make things more interesting by dialing up the heaviness and incorporating a good amount of Khemmis-esque stoner doom along with weird Danzig and Tiamat-isms.” From the crypt comes…monster riffs!
“Svart Records is a bastion of strange Finnish acts, and Jess and the Ancient Ones is one of the strangest. Starting with the same 70s occult rock indulged in by Ghost and Jex Thoth, they add in surfer rock and more than a little tripped out psychedelic acid rock to arrive at something altogether different.” Surf’s up and Satan is down!
“One Foot in the Flesh Grave’s take on doom punk and swamp rock is just the kind of experience I was hoping for. Formed in the cruel, unrelenting heat of Corpus Christi (Texas), Wailin Storms must have quickly realized that to stand out, their sound needed more than just the country and rockabilly twang they were being exposed to.” Music for misfits and serial killers.
“I’m sure by now you all know that your favorite artists don’t exactly live the lives they write about. Slayer’s Tom Araya is a devout Catholic and a proud family man. Similarly, W.A.S.P.’s Blackie Lawless gave up fucking like a beast for Jesus. Glenn Danzig loves his cats and Morbid Angel’s Trey Azagthoth is a gamer and a Sailor Moon fanatic. In other words, it’s not all that often you encounter a musician (or band) that lives up to the extreme lyrics they pen. They’re just regular, mundane human beings like you and me.” How disappointing….
“I must have had the phrase “Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge” drilled into my head by every music teacher imaginable. Everybody practices chords and scales repeatedly, right? Riffs? Solos? You have to in order to succeed in anything. Well, how about songs? Japan’s newest export in industrialized noise metal, Legion of Andromeda, have set out to challenge your notions of what noise and repetition can create via their debut, Iron Scorn.” And who doesn’t like fudge?
“Cast your minds back to a time when metal music was not cool. Nay, indeed, a time when metal was anathema to all that was considered to be “chic” and “in.” A time when your favorite bands were actually encouraged by the music industry to play slower, cut their hair, and write sensitive lyrics about their childhoods. Yes, this unfortunately really happened. Our semi-irregular feature “90s Metal Weirdness” focuses on albums released between 1992 and 2001 and which we all probably would rather forget. But in the service of publicly shaming the musicians involved, we have pushed forward.”
“Well, look who wandered off the homage reservation. Sweden’s In Solitude made their mark with 2011’s The World. the Flesh. the Devil. and its uncannily accurate aping of vintage Mercyful Fate. So close was the sound to albums like Melissa and Don’t Break the Oath, that several people I played it for thought it was a reunion album or re-recorded demo material. While homage bands are all well and good, it seems these chaps wanted to shake off that image and on Sister, they’ve done so quite impressively. While the Mercyful Fate influence is still apparent (especially in the vocals), the new material takes their Fate worship and coats it with scads of gothic and doom sensibility while adding a strong Danzig vibe as well.” Why would a band so skilled at ripping off one of the best metal bands of all time ever change their approach? Because that’s what art is all about, you dullards!!
