Iron Walrus

Necrutero – Metallo Review

Necrutero – Metallo Review

“Recently while at a burrito shop, the worst fate befell me that can strike any poor customer of the food industry: the girl behind the counter got all my portions wrong. Sorrow enveloped me as a few paltry pieces of meat were laid out sparsely across the shell, the cheese meagerly scattered, the vegetables a seeming afterthought. What was presented to me was not the glorious bursting-at-the-seams juicy platter of expectations, but a vaguely meat flavored, vegetable sampling, cheese encrusted shell. The quality of the food—the succulent beef, the crispy lettuce—was overshadowed by a miserly portion at the hands of a blasé employee.” What the hell does this have to do with the Italian deathy thrash band Necrutero!? Click to find out!

Iron Walrus – A Beast Within Review

Iron Walrus – A Beast Within Review

“Exploding through the frigid waves and frothing foam, the leviathan’s ponderous girth smashes down upon the rocky shore with a thunderous wet slap. Slowly, laboriously, the tidal titan heaves himself ashore, massive muscles undulating under the dense layers of blubber enrobed in barnacle encrusted plate metal. The Iron Walrus has come this day, and nothing on the beach can move him, nor compel his to departure.” Coo coo ca choo.