Kiss

Thor – Metal Avenger Review

Thor – Metal Avenger Review

“Whether you know it or not, Jon Mikl Thor is a living legend. His bizarre 40 year journey through the entertainment wood chipper has taken him to the disparate worlds of bodybuilding, live quasi-porn theater, proto-heavy metal and Grade-Z horror films. Through it all and come what may, the amiable Canadian Juggernaut just keeps smiling and flexing away, forever awaiting his big break.” The hammer will fall on all those who deny Thor’s trveness.

Coffins – The Fleshland Review

Coffins – The Fleshland Review

“Japan is better remembered as the country of eclectic and elaborately dressed, KISS-inspired metal bands. But it is also home to extreme metal bands with a straightforward musical approach. No gimmicks; just plain clothes, unshaved faces, silly lyrics, cartoonish album artwork and bulldozing riff after bulldozing riff. Coffins is such a band, and they are a 17-year-old, vomitey death/doom metal band from the Japanese region full of Pidgeys, Rattatas, Geodudes, Tentacools and Zubats. Despite being surrounded by dozens and dozens of cutesy critters, their music is anything but for the Gameboy- or Nintendo-DS-wielding toddlers.” Death metal from the Isle of Japan loaded with big, ugly riffs and vomitus vocals. Are you sold yet? Happy Metal Guy is here to close the deal and win those steak knives!

Avantasia – The Mystery of Time Review

Avantasia – The Mystery of Time Review

“You have to give Tobias Sammet his steely props. He doesn’t do things half-assed. Nope, he goes big, bold and lets the Metal Gods sort shit out. His Edguy material is plenty pretentious and overblown, but it can’t hold a magic candle to the sheer pretentious pomposity and bombast of his Avantasia project. Taking cues from Arjen Luccasen’s Ayreon outings, Sammet drags in every singer, guitarist and hanger-on he can and it seems he’s playing a metallic version of Pokemon (gotta catch em all). His last feat was the impressive double release of the Angel of Babylon and The Wicked Symphony albums (my fanboyish reviews of which, landed me a spot at AMG Industries, Ltd. for some reason), and I was very curious how he could top those massive platters of symphonic excess.” So how exactly does Mr. Sammet top his prior output? Steel Druhm is here to unravel the mysteries of time.

Retro-spective Review: Camel – Music Inspired by the Snow Goose

Retro-spective Review: Camel – Music Inspired by the Snow Goose

So, during this time of burnout, one thing doesn’t seem to be changing: the will to critique things and to tell people how important my opinion is how cool some music just really is. One of the things that happens to me when I get burned out on metal is that I go back and start researching other shit like, for example, the guy who wrote Meat Loaf’s music (Jim Steinman) or in this case, 70s prog. The ’70s were an era when music was musical and the production didn’t suck fucking ass and there was no douchebag screaming about how tough he was into a microphone to try to make you realize just how extreme his music is (unless of course you count KISS, but I don’t, ’cause they suck and they weren’t screaming, they were just douching it up).

Iron Maiden – The Final Frontier Review

Iron Maiden – The Final Frontier Review

Iron Maiden is the greatest heavy metal band to ever live. Thirty years after the release of their self-titled album, they are arguably just as relevant as they ever have been, not resting on their laurels and imitating a hits jukebox, but instead touring the world playing their new material to the joy of fans everywhere. After what was a rousing success with their most recent record, the 2006 release of A Matter of Life and Death, there is actually maybe a bit more pressure on the band to produce something that is quality, memorable and, frankly, classic. Especially with the rumors floating around that this is Maiden’s final album, spurred even further on by the fact that Steve Harris helped write every song on the record, the pressure cooker of fan scrutiny is reaching fever pitch. And so it falls to this Angry Metal Guy to try to put all of this into some sort of context; to try to listen to my favorite band with fresh ears, and I’ve come to some realizations about the band in the process.