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Battle Beast – Battle Beast Review

Battle Beast – Battle Beast Review

“Sweet mother of Jesusabub, is there no relief from 2013’s merciless crusade against bands I like? One by one I’ve watched them fall to some diabolical curse of ungoodness and all I can do is stare at the release schedule with unease and wonder…who’s next? The answer is Finland’s bullet-belted cheese mongers, Battle Beast. As you may or may not care to remember, I made quite a fuss over their Steel debut due to it’s infectious brand of Euro-power tinged with thrash and traditional metal. It was ridiculously cheese-tastic, but it had more balls than a gym teacher’s storage closet and every song was an earworm Paul Atreides himself would be proud to ride. A huge part of the band’s charm came from the leather lunged power and presence of front woman Nitte Valo. She was part banshee, part rock star, all metal and her pipes were impossible to resist. Naturally, she bailed and now the Beast is fronted by new femme fatale Noora Louhimo and though she’s good, she’s no Nitte.” So how does a Nitte-less Battle Beast fare in the cold, cruel world of 2013? Steel Druhm says some words and points some fingers.

Queensrÿche vs. Queensrÿche: Trial of the Century

Queensrÿche vs. Queensrÿche: Trial of the Century

During the past year or so, I’ve found myself in a situation where I work from home, and generally don’t venture out much. Typically, people like this are called “housewives” and watch daytime television to keep them from focusing on their own miserable lives. Unfortunately, I don’t fit that description, and I demand a little more from my daily distractions. You see, I have a need within me to see good things happen to good people, and more importantly, to see really bad things happen to people who are assholes. And the thing that’s been getting me through the day for the past 10 months is the endless drama of Queensryche vs. Geoff Tate.” Join Mr. Fisting as he runs you through the drama, the diva and the saliva. Basically, it’s like the whole O.J. Simpson thing, but with more guyliner.