2019 saw Holdeneye shock the world by asking the time-honored question we’ve all at least passively pondered: what’s the heaviest record of all time? Kronos, for his part, appeared to answer a short while later in his review for Devourment’s Obscene Majesty. If you asked New York death metal institution and heaviest band in the universe Mortician, the answer would hopefully be a Mortician record.” Brutal cue.
“The mystique surrounding Ruin — the band started in the ’90s, but members were incarcerated and institutionalized, and now their twisted musical vision is coming to life and they’re some sort of cult — seems, at the very least, exaggerated. To dive fully into — and thus to fully enjoy — their sophomore release Human Annihilation, we have to suspend our disbelief and think of Ruin not as a band but as a ‘death metal cult,’ as they would describe it. Only then can we dive into what they’re doing and what they seem to be trying to portray.” Metal from the big house.
“Samples in music have been a controversial point throughout its history. Their use ranges from the occasional embellishment to set the mood, to incorporating it into the lifeblood of the music, which was part of the origins of hip-hop. Detractors claim it to lack creativity by definition, because it means using someone else’s work. Defenders argue that the application of existing work in a different context is what makes it creative. No matter what your position, the fact is that plenty of metal bands have made use of them, from political voices in Megadeth to horror movie samples in Mortician.” A sampling of doom.
“Interesting accent these bands have got there. New Jersey? No, New Zealand. And Australia. Well then, let’s throw another shrimp on the barbie! 36 minutes of blackened thunder from down under await those with a taste for the cavernous on Call of the Maelstrom from Vassafor and Temple Nightside.” Nasty stuff for nasty people. You know who you are.
“As someone who writes music reviews, I take pride in being able to craft together a 450-550 word essay on why you should pick up an album, or why you should avoid it entirely. Keeping the reader on their tippy-toes while painting a vivid picture for your eyes and ears to digest is a great joy of mine. However, as the world aged by a year this week, I too have added another year to my existence. In doing so, I’ve realized that there comes a time where you have to dispense with the hyperbolic bullshit and just call it as it is.” Such a comment is rarely the prelude to something positive.
“As 2015 makes her grand and stately entrance, bear with and support me as I try to hunt down even more new blackened death metal albums that sound exactly like Septicflesh.” Madam X has her foibles, but she also has plenty of quirks. Join her as she unveils a Top Ten(ish) list sure to bumfuzzle and befuddle.
“Here at AMG, despite being metalheads and craving the extremest of the extreme and longing for the shock factor, at heart we’re still a puritanical bunch of wussies. Case in point, when faced with a band that chooses a name that’s unconventional to the point of being offensive, the band gets branded with a big scarlet letter, Twitter feeds blow up, public shunning takes place and no review is forthcoming.” While the rest of AMG ran for the hills, Madam X fearlessly tackled Ass to Mouth.
