Portal

Malthusian – Across Deaths Review

Malthusian – Across Deaths Review

“Remember when you “cleaned out” your basement and swept a pile of concrete, paint chips, and earwig corpses into the corner? Malthusian broke into your house, snorted it, and recorded Across Deaths there while you were at work. This album will give you an asthma attack and reduce your children’s IQ by ten points.” Population control metal.

Vomitor – Pestilent Death Review

Vomitor – Pestilent Death Review

“What’s that? You’re tired of the progressive melodoom or whatever foofoo bullshit we’re giving Record o’ the Month to these days? Of course, you are. You want something heavier. Faster. Rawer. Something that feels like eating stale Chinese food out of a back alley garbage can while a stray cat gives birth in the background. We’ve all been there, and the solution is simple: Vomitor.” Vomitor, repeat as needed.

Grave Upheaval – Untitled Review

Grave Upheaval – Untitled Review

“Much like their countrymen countrypeople fellow Austral beings in Portal, the only thing Grave Upheaval cherish more than cavernous production is their own obscurity — though this could be because Portal, Impetuous Ritual, and Grave Upheaval are the cast of a half-dozen or so shadowy musicians. Call them kvlt, call them private; the result is the second Grave Upheaval album once again untitled and once again filled with indecipherable moaning, squealing terrors, and suffocating doom-death.” In a cavern, no one can hear you spelunk.

Chaos Echœs – Mouvement Review

Chaos Echœs – Mouvement Review

“Contrary to popular belief, researchers have recently concluded that all metal does not, in fact, sound the same. Turns out, there are completely different styles of metal altogether. Like, tons of them. There’s a speed one, and a black one, and a doooom one and a melodeath… *ahem* Anyway, the point of my having shattered your world with such unfathomable concepts was to pave the way for blasphemous trvth bomb number two: it’s not always about the riffs, yo.” Metal awareness.

Portal – Ion Review

Portal – Ion Review

“Since their inception, Portal’s outre take on death metal has been something of a curiosity; a malformed fetus suspended in sepia alcohol behind so many dusty artifacts. Few other artists have encroached on their sound, and even fewer can pretend to challenge their simultaneously dour and frenzied Victorian aesthetic. Theirs is horror music, to be sure, but the horror stems from a sort of noir psychedelia, an all-encompassing fractal unrest where the creak of the floorboards and the crack of colliding planets are indistinguishable in scope.” The cake is a lie.

Altarage – Endinghent Review

Altarage – Endinghent Review

Altarage’s debut turned quite a few tar-covered heads, each new adherent drawn in by its tendrils of sticky ooze, a concoction of lo-fi hideousness that languished in the bogs somewhere between Portal and Teitanblood. Not the most original of albums, but it pounded a chord for metalheads oppressed by melody and clean production.” The sound of chunder.

The Furor – Cavalries of the Occult Review

The Furor – Cavalries of the Occult Review

“The patriot in me gets a little warm and fuzzy when contemplating the healthy state of the Australian metal scene. Whether it be divisive big guns Ne Obliviscaris and King Parrot, head-scratching experimental acts like Portal and Hope Drone, the thrashy old-school goodness of Hobbs’ Angel of Death and Deströyer 666, cutting edge modern tearaways Départe and Deadspace, or reliable tech death stalwarts Psycroptic, there’s a hugely satisfying selection of Aussie metal to satiate a wide variety of extreme tastes.” Is it just me or do Aussies like their D’s and P’s?

Crucified Mortals – Psalms of the Dead Choir Review

Crucified Mortals – Psalms of the Dead Choir Review

“Choosing what to do for Halloween is, in some sense, a lot like choosing how to be a metal band. You can try to deliberately frighten people, like Portal, be as provocative as possible, like Anal Cunt, flaunt your good feminine looks like the one member of Amaranthe anyone cares about, do something wacky and out-of-the-box like Troldhaugen, or you can throw on some old goblin mask and just go get drunk, loud and rowdy.” The goblins and ghosts are at the door.