“Considering most of you have kitchen scales lying around, it may seem strange that heaviness appears to have a subjective element. While no one will argue Behemoth to be heavier than, say, ABBA, what constitutes the ultimate in aural obesity seems to differ from person to person.” Heavy is as heavy does.
Self Released
Undrask – Battle Through Time Review
“With a basic internet connection offering an up-to-the-minute cornucopia of quality metal releases, snap judgments have become an unfortunate way of life. On my first listen, Undrask came off as middling melodeath in the vain of acts emulating Clayman—In Flames and peak Children of Bodom. Packaged in a blue-and-orange visage that could leave Michael Bay weak in the knees, debut Battle Through Time initially left me stifling a yawn. Sorry, better luck next time. NEXT!” A funny thing happened on the way to the review.
Rebel Wizard – Triumph of Gloom [Things You Might Have Missed 2016]
“One-man projects are increasingly common in the modern metal market, as dedicated individuals take the purely DIY route and leave band politics and shenanigans to other folks. Personally, 2016 has yielded two impressive discoveries of Australian one-man projects, from the slick melo-death theatrics of Valtari to this impressively vitriolic slice of mayhem from Rebel Wizard.” You rebel scum.
Protest the Hero – Pacific Myth EP [Things You Might Have Missed 2016]
“In the past, mentioning Protest the Hero among the trve resulted in long side-eyes or questions of “Are they really metal?” (I can’t wait to see how well this review goes over.) But since we let a certain fat-lipped band in here, you’re damn sure I’m going to feature my favorite Verb the Noun.” Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should.
Infinite Earths – Into the Void Review
“In recent years I’ve shied away from tech death. Sure I loved Origin back in their Antithesis era, but these days if I want noodles I’ll just make some fucking pasta. That said, a band name as cool as Infinite Earths was tough to ignore, particularly in how it invoked notions of parallel universes and promises of sweet purple cover art with a cosmic beast devouring a planet or some shit.” Take all you can eat, but eat all you take.
Flidais – Kazador Review
“Judging a book by its cover is an age-old tradition, despite the advice of moms everywhere. Albums are much the same. For instance, if the cover is a black passe-partout around a black and white figure, with a logo I can’t read, it’s usually a one-man black metal band. With the name of an ancient Celtic goddess and an album cover more lilac than the air freshener aisle in the local Wal-Mart, Flidais seem intent to have you believe they play some sort of flowery hippie folk metal, like the Grateful Dead with more distortion.” Lilac is the new black.
Krepitus – The Eyes of the Soulless Review
“Metal fans collect sub-genres like Barbie dolls: in a huge assortment of flavors, often mildly disturbing, and most pleasant when pulled apart and recombined. It’s almost strange when a band plays a sub-genre straight and usually we cover up our embarrassment by transforming ‘death metal’ into something like ‘old school Swedish death metal.’ Luckily, I have no such problems, because Krepitus play one of the more prevalent genre combos: death thrash.” Mix n’ thrash.
Dead Conspiracy – Dead Conspiracy Review
“It shouldn’t surprise you that Dead Conspiracy plays the sort of death metal that has little in common with modern incarnations of it or even Morbid Angel, but rather sounds like over the top thrash. My first impression was a less punky war metal or Possessed on speed but with less cool solos.” From the days when every town had Seven Churches.
Hemina – Venus Review
“Album length is an ongoing discussion here at Angry Metal Guy, with one side arguing for more material and the option to listen in parts or mix tracks into playlists, and the correct side arguing for self-editing, trimming the fat and creating a cohesive listening experience.” Revise, revisit, remove.
Shark Infested Daughters – These Tides, Our Tombs Review
“It seems misogynistic violence is on trend in metalcore. Feed Her to the Sharks led the aquatic way with Zombies Ate My Girlfriend chomping in its wake, both exacting satisfying chugs and saccharine melodies unto the metal public in a reasonable throwback to the All That Remains– or Bullet For My Valentine-dominated scene from the mid-’00s. Now Shark Infested Daughters steps up to invoke unpleasant images of ravaged women with their debut, These Tides, Our Tombs.” Please don’t feed the freakin’ sharks!