“Infernal Execrator is a band that enjoys beating its listeners into tenderized meat, then massages the broken flesh with salt and vinegar. Their 2014 debut, Ad Infinitum Satanic Adherent, was a nonstop bloodletter that didn’t leave much to the imagination. But this year’s Obsolete Ordinance appears to have the flavors of a midsummer stew. How rich are these flavors?” Stewing in evil juices.
“But the ones I came back to the most were the underrated groups, like Ofermod, Svartsyn, Urgehal, and Taake. To me, this latter group has some of the best black metal ever recorded. In Taake’s case, Nattestid ser porten vid, Over Bjoergvin graater himmerik, and Hordalands doedskvad still make me dribble over my lower lip like a fucking vegetable. But, like most black metal giants, Taake’s recent material has begun to slip in quality. Their 2014 release, Stridens hus, left my throat parched and now my need for nourishment is at an all-time high. The question is: will Taake’s newest release, Kong Vinter, wet lips or will it cause them to crack and bleed?” Lip care is crucial in a frostbitten kingdom of ice.
“I won’t lie, when I heard there was a new Sarke poised to drop on the unsuspecting masses, I scrambled to get my hands on it before Steel Druhm could review the unholy hell out of it.” And I would have too if it weren’t for you meddling kids!
“Without a doubt, Urgehal’s final release, Aeons in Sodom, has to be the toughest review I’ve yet written. It’s not difficult because it sucks or lacks anything worth writing about; rather, it’s difficult because of the strong personal and emotional attachment I have to Urgehal. I am a fanboy, in the truest sense of the word. What makes it worse is that Aeons of Sodom should have never happened.” The Doctor needs a therapist, stat!
“Back in 2012 I reviewed Ragnarok’s Malediction and promptly fell hard for the band’s fifth vocalist – HansFyrste. His blend of Hell and damnation hit all the right spots with this AMG spokeswoman for all things “necro,” and naturally prompted me to go scrummaging around into his side projects.” When Madam X scrummages, black metal reviews get written. Read all about her latest bout of stalking and obsession.
“Wow, what a year! A large portion of 2013 has had me working my ass off in preparation for my stint out at sea with 70,000 Tons of Pure Fucking METAL! I’ve tried to curtail my excitement, but fuck it, this is huge – Carcass, Septicflesh, Finntroll, Overkill… what more could a girl ask for?” As Madam X shamelessly drops free plugs for a certain novelty cruise line, she also delivers her best albums of the year. That lady can multi-task!
“Ever wondered what hell the unholy union of Germany’s Dark Fortress and Secrets of the Moon would spawn? Alright, now let’s make things a little more interesting and maybe just a little more sordid. Let’s bring in Sweden’s Naglfar and turn this into a lascivious little three-some. Taking it a step further, ever wondered what their bastard child would sound like? Well here you have it! Eudaimony is the spawn of just such an unholy, messy union, with former Dark Fortress front man Matthias Jell (Azathoth) on vocals, Naglfar’s Marcus E. Norman on guitars, bass and synthesizer and Secrets of the Moon’s Jörg Heemann (Thrawn Thelemnar) on drums.” Grim, unhappy blackness from a veritable super group of black metal luminaries? That’s got Madam X written all over it…in BLOOD!
“With a hefty eight years under their bullet belts since the release of WW, Gehenna make their long-awaited return with their latest funeral doom offering… uh no wait, scratch that! It’s most definitely snow-capped, Norwegian, black metal following in the same general direction as say Taake or Urgehal. With a hulking eight year wait, I was holding my breath in expectation of a funereal dirge at the very least…” Madam X thought these cats were long dead and buried and since she loves listening to funeral music, she’s a bit put out that they’ve come back from the Great Beyond. Regardless, she’s a professional so she does her job and gives some grim analysis.
“End days… Fimbulvetr… the cold, darkness of three consecutive winters; the sun and moon torn from the sky; the dead rising from their graves and poison filling the air – all-encompassing despair! That’s what comes to mind when you pick up Sarkom’s Doomsday Elite, well that and cardio; double-tap; limber up and it’s a marathon not a sprint, unless it’s a sprint, then sprint already! But I digress, Norwegian based Sarkom play the kind of black metal that’s packed with jagged, razor sharp blast-beats, inflicting a bite as deep and destructive as say Gravdal, Endezzma or Nidingr.” End days, marathons, cold and darkness. Some of these things make Madam X happy. Find out which!
“I’ve noticed that the face of Norwegian black metal is a changing, it’s becoming more adventurous, more rock infused, more progressive and God forbid, more accessible [well, it can’t get LESS accessible — Steel Druhm]. I can confirm however, that while they’re not just all about the evil any longer, they definitely haven’t lost sight or forgotten about the mighty Dark Lord Satan! Breath people, all is still right in the world.” How does Koldbrann fit in to this new movement? Follow Madam X on her trend analysis.
