W.A.S.P.

Professor Black – Sunrise Review

Professor Black – Sunrise Review

Chris Black (A.K.A. Professor Black) is an entire music scene unto himself. He’s played with Pharaoh, Superchrist and Nachtmystium as well as being the founder of Dawnbringer, High Spirits and Aktor. Now he’s releasing not one, not two, but three new albums under the Professor Black brand, all on the same day, all with vastly different styles and intents. Because I’m powerful and full of Viking ape rage, I took Sunrise, which is a lovingly trve ode to Bathory‘s Viking era, as well as classic metal artists like Running Wild and W.A.S.P.” Black for the Viking attack.

Slægt – Beautiful and Damned Review

Slægt – Beautiful and Damned Review

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if Jon Nödtviedt decided to put Dissection to rest after the highly-influential Storm of the Lights Bane and decided to join Dark Tranquillity? Yes, I know, total blasphemy, but weirder things have happened. I mean, W.A.S.P. put out a better record last year than Slayer, for crying out loud. Nothing is completely out of the realm of possibility, right?

Dr. Fisting’s Top 10(ish) of 2015

Dr. Fisting’s Top 10(ish) of 2015

“2015 seems to have yielded a larger-than-usual crop of good music. For the first time since I’ve joined this fine website, I’ve found a lot more than 10 albums that could have easily made this list, and I’ve had to make some tough calls. Obviously, this is a good problem to have, and I’m not complaining.”

As always, if your favorite album isn’t on my list, it’s because your opinion is wrong, you have terrible taste in music and I don’t like you. Onward!

Signum Regis – Chapter IV: The Reckoning Review

Signum Regis – Chapter IV: The Reckoning Review

“Being the black metal fan I am, I’ve scared many a girlfriend with my devil-worshiping, goat-sacrificing practices; which – according to these people – are not the result of the music but because that’s who I am and why I listen to metal music. All people have opinions and metal fans are no different. Many were recently offended because of the semi-regular appearance of the Christian deity in this year’s releases. As you can probably surmise, Signum Regis is here to continue this God-fearing trend.” We’re reviewing so much godly music lately that we may qualify for tax exempt status!

90s Metal Weirdness: W.A.S.P. – Kill.Fuck.Die

90s Metal Weirdness: W.A.S.P. – Kill.Fuck.Die

“Cast your minds back to a time when metal music was not cool. Nay, indeed, a time when metal was anathema to all that was considered to be “chic” and “in.” A time when your favorite bands were actually encouraged by the music industry to play slower, cut their hair, and write sensitive lyrics about their childhoods. Yes, this unfortunately really happened. Our semi-irregular feature “90s Metal Weirdness” focuses on albums released between 1992 and 2001 and which we all probably would rather forget. But in the service of publicly shaming the musicians involved, we have pushed forward.” Industrial grade W.A.S.P. sounds good on paper, right?

W.A.S.P. – Golgotha Review

W.A.S.P. – Golgotha Review

“Blackie Lawless has certainly lived an interesting life. Once the perfect target for those clucking hens in the PMRC, he embodied everything uptight suburban soccer moms hated. He looked like a glam demon, advocated the excessive use of drugs and alcohol, and his sleazy metal band wore oversized codpieces and wrote songs about fucking like a beast (I bet Tipper Gore got a secret thrill from that tune).” Vatican tested, PMRC disapproved (still).

Mike Tramp – Nomad Review

Mike Tramp – Nomad Review

“Not that the plethora of throwback retro-thrash bands wasn’t evidence enough, but the 80’s happened. Fashion was horrendous and hairstyles were worse. Nintendo had kids blowing into their cartridges the world over. And on MTV, for every Iron Maiden and Metallica video that was played, there was a gaggle of hair bands saturating the airwaves to the point of ozone layer depletion from all that Aqua Net used. White Lion was one of those bands, enjoying success after success until Kurt Cobain came along and ruined everything for them.” Let’s see hands from all the little fighters in the hall!

Grymm Comments: On the Separation of Art from Artist

Grymm Comments: On the Separation of Art from Artist

“I’m sure by now you all know that your favorite artists don’t exactly live the lives they write about. Slayer‘s Tom Araya is a devout Catholic and a proud family man. Similarly, W.A.S.P.‘s Blackie Lawless gave up fucking like a beast for Jesus. Glenn Danzig loves his cats and Morbid Angel‘s Trey Azagthoth is a gamer and a Sailor Moon fanatic. In other words, it’s not all that often you encounter a musician (or band) that lives up to the extreme lyrics they pen. They’re just regular, mundane human beings like you and me.” How disappointing….

Retro-spective Review: Lizzy Borden – Master of Disquise

Retro-spective Review: Lizzy Borden – Master of Disquise

“Lizzy Borden was the charming tyke famous for chopping up her folks with an axe (allegedly). Lizzy Borden the band (and the man) are much less famous, and that’s why I’m casting the attention nets back through time to land their magnum opus for your consideration. As part of the wave of slightly glamy hair metal acts that spewed from L.A. in the 80s, Lizzy and W.A.S.P. were basically cut from the same animal print cloth. They wanted to be metal, but sought to incorporate lots of radio friendly hooks and glam, sleaze n’ trash theatrics.” Ready for a hair metal rock opera? Wait, come back, it’s really good!