“Have you ever gone camping, and that one friend brings his guitar to play songs around the fire? But the thing is, he can’t really play, he’s a shitty singer, and he only knows Bob Seger songs. You sit there saying to yourself, ‘I wish I was actually camping with rock legend John Garcia. That would be the best camping trip ever.’” Cold breeze, clean air….
“Old-school thrash metal warms the cockles of my olde, sinewy heart. Canadian thrash warms them even more. Having grown up on a Canadian thrash diet of Exciter, Annihilator, Anvil, and others, a solitary tear comes to my eye when some young upstarts attempt to bring the glorious past back to life. When Vancouver thrashers Terrifier’s second album, Weapons of Thrash Destruction, landed in my promo bin, I donned my denim vest, my studded leather wristbands, and my kamikaze headband, and I sat back in my lawn chair with the stereo volume beyond acceptable, hoping to be taken back to a simpler time in life.” WTD’s do exist!
“Heredity can be a blessing and a curse. Unless you’re George Clooney, you will be endlessly compared to that elderly, more famous relative of yours no matter how different you proclaim to be. Often, lineage will be the curiosity factor that garners early attention, but even more often it will be a stumbling block to legitimacy. Take Lauren Harris, for example, daughter of Iron Maiden’s Steve Harris. She’s been trying for over a decade to make a go of it, with little luck. Another “Child of Maiden,” Austin Dickinson, is bravely trying to carve his own path, first with unmemorable metalcore act Rise to Remain and now with As Lions.” How far is that apple gonna roll?
“These days, PR companies feel the need to come up with unique classifications and genres for the bands they are repping. I’ve lost count of the number of “new” genres we’ve had to add to our tag system this year. Great example: this new release from Angela Martyr, with a label prominently affixed to the cover declaring the music as ‘grungy, mechanical, pessimistic metalgaze.’ Okay. Why don’t they just say, ‘Sounds like Nine Inch Nails?'” They’re paid by the word, Huckster.
![Cult of Luna and Julie Christmas – Mariner [Things You Might Have Missed 2016]](https://www.angrymetalguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/cult-of-luna-julie-christmas-mariner-768x768.jpg)
“For me, the most compelling collaboration of 2016 was the transatlantic partnership of post-metal stalwarts Cult of Luna and post-hardcore siren Julie Christmas. Both acts on their own provoke ample curiosity — Cult of Luna for their orchestral post-metal machinations, and Christmas for her insanely talented and schizophrenic vocal acrobatics — but put them together and you have a recipe for something amazing.” It’s a post-Christmas miracle!
![Gojira – Magma [Things You Might Have Missed 2016]](https://www.angrymetalguy.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/gojira-magma-1-768x752.jpg)
“Gojira’s Magma was a pretty major release this year, and while it didn’t get any Angry Metal Guy love it got plenty of Huck N Roll love. So much so, in fact, that it landed in my comprehensive, well thought out, Best of 2016 list.” Feel the Huck love.
“Winter nights mean crackling fireplaces, warm sweaters, and mulled cider. They mean snuggling under a comfy blanket in the warmth of your house while you watch snow gently fall outside your window. They mean piping hot stew, thick wool socks, and fluffy cats curled up in your lap. What else provides warmth and comfort like that in the dead of winter? Instrumental progressive metal, of course.” Can you cuddle up to a noodle?
“December is a brutal month for us lowly reviewers. Between unreasonable demands for End of Year lists from our monstrous editors to unreasonable Christmas wish lists from our equally monstrous children, we get yanked in every direction. To make matters worse, all the good bands have finished issuing their albums and we are left sifting through the muck and the mire, desperately trying to find something that will boost our average review scores” Second prize is a set of steak knives.
“Eclectic is the name of the game when it comes to Dot Legacy. The French quartet has been around for seven years, playing a unique brand of fuzzed-out energy rock. How’s that for a genre? To be honest, Dot Legacy’s second offering, To the Others, kind of defies genre categorization. It’s a mish-mash of everything, and that was the intent going in.” Kitchen sink-core.
“I don’t know what the hell is going on in Finland these days. Late last year the quirky northerners gave us a band by the name of Speedtrap, a proto-thrash garage band who put out a messy but fun album, Straight Shooter. Now we get Initiated, another garage band naturally featuring Speedtrap’s guitarist on the lead axe (I don’t know if there are enough people in Finland for bands to not share members), for a less thrashy but no less messy record, World on Fire.” Raw power or raw chowder?
