“They say don’t judge a book by its cover. But when its cover fuses the great sphinx and pyramids from Powerslave with the red sky and robots from Somewhere in Time, you can’t help but jump to conclusions.” I for one have been waiting for a Powerslave in Time album.
“There comes a time in your life when you have to say to yourself, “Self, what’s wrong with you? Sure, you have responsibilities… obligations, even. What would happen if you were to just, I dunno, shut your brain off for a little wild and just go happily apeshit? You know… legally, of course. You have to be at work in the morning and your significant other will be pissed if he/she has to pick you up in jail at 4 am.” Italy’s Children of Technology pretty much have your soundtrack ready for you with Future Decay.” Release the Moshkenstein!
“Whenever a band can non-ironically cite Angel Witch and Tank as influences, you pretty much know what you’re in for. On their début album Starvation, Seattle trio Blood of Kings plays the sort of proto-thrash that used to be called “speed metal” back in the day. These days we don’t call it anything, because we’re too busy drinking heavily and buying back patches on eBay.” Need something new to go with that vintage back patch? Royal blood always jazzes things up nicely!
“Yer Metal Is Olde is a recurring thing that we’re using to fill up space while we scramble around looking for reviews of new material that is worth reviewing. The idea was spurred on by the swath of amazing and classic records that are turning 10, 20, or 30 this year. It’s crazy to think that all the stuff that we worship is really as old as it is. Time moves quickly, but these classics never seem to lose their shine. Still, their enduring quality doesn’t change that your favorite metal is fucking old.” And what could be older than Motorhead? Nothing!
“Like your speed metal served up fast, loud and dirty with a Lemmy-like grunt? How about dripping in Venom? Like their English counterparts, Intöxicated’s Germanic brand of metal unleashes ten tons of pent-up instrumental and lyrical debauchery and intends to raise eyebrows and drop jaws. In other words it’s heavy as fuck, uncompromisingly raw and you’ll either love it or be disgusted by it.” Find out what Madam X thinks of German speed metal, alcohol, sex, partying and motorcycles, all in the name of keeping you (our fine metal brethren) informed.
