Dr. A.N. Grier

Shine on you crazy (King) Diamond.
Moonspell – Hermitage Review

Moonspell – Hermitage Review

“In these times of isolation, the band has come to the realization that their time is coming to an end. A statement that saddens me to read. But Moonspell feels they still have a little more juice left in them. This retrospection has resulted in a new focus—a focus to buckle down and use their remaining time as a band to pump out the best songs possible. Along with that, they”ve cut the fat off Hermitage. The keys, the sad vocals, the gothic melodicness still intact, it’s the orchestrations that are gone. Like the band’s good ole days. But, stripped to barebones, is the band even capable of recreating their greatest moments?” Waning crescent.

Magoth – Invictus Review

Magoth – Invictus Review

“Thankfully, all the other writers have me around to do write-ups of actual good music. At first, this review was a TYMHM piece. But, ‘thanks’ to Covid, Magoth‘s November 2020 release is now a February 2021 release. Which, in my opinion, is even better. It’s now a chance for Invictus to have a proper release and a proper review. This is fitting, being that this German quartet, who bleeds Naglfar and Watain, might have released their best album to date.” Magoth infestation.

Crystal Viper – The Cult Review

Crystal Viper – The Cult Review

“I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little afraid of picking up the new Crystal Viper. Having never let me down, the band’s 2019 release, Tales of Fire and Ice, was truly disappointing. In fact, it’s so disappointing, that after three-to-four spins, I erased it from my computer and threw out the review I was writing. Sadly, its only mention was as a 2019 Disappointment o’ the Year. So, yeah, I was a little worried.” Cult is just another word for family.

Transatlantic – The Absolute Universe

Transatlantic – The Absolute Universe

“Yet, Transatlantic is one of the more pretentious groups I’ve ever heard. When I first realized that the debut record, SMPTe, was the first letter of each member’s surname, I rolled my eyes so hard I fell off a bridge. Even so, this foursome knows how to play, and Portnoy has made himself a diverse drummer that can play many styles. So, when we got Transatlantic‘s The Absolute Universe, I had to partake. I mean, who else would be dumb enough to review a three-disc record?” A universe of material.

Winterage – The Inheritance of Beauty Review

Winterage – The Inheritance of Beauty Review

“You know when you lose a bet and find yourself wearing a Red Sox jersey and forced to eat a hundred cocktail weenies until you purge yourself in the tub? Well, that’s nothing compared to the Paw of Steel punishment for picking on Kenny. Ken told me it was corset-core. Cool, I like corsets. There may or may not have been the mention of Nightwish, but I cataloged that as trollarchy. So, I took the punishment and rolled with it. Well, you know those times when a movie character comes to a dramatic realization? When the camera zooms in, and they look up at nothing and whisper, “Dear GOD”?” Cheesy justice.

Heathen – Empire of the Blind [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

Heathen – Empire of the Blind [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

“Heathen. I’ve got three shirts that say it and nine people that call me that. I liken it to a word like ‘dickhead.’ It’s got great pop and works in all situations. Though it’s maybe more fun to call my mom a ‘dickhead’ rather than a ‘heathen.’ But, I suppose it depends on the day. Speaking of fun, let’s talk about that other Heathen. The one that released Empire of the Blind, and we never got it.” Blind fury.

Them – Return to Hemmersmoor [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

Them – Return to Hemmersmoor [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

“I can’t believe we never received the promo for Them‘s Return to Hemmersmoor. I mean, seriously, I’m their biggest fan! Even when their first album fell into the hands of an anti-Diamonder, I still hailed the shit out of it. This October, I even asked my kids if they wanted to watch Tim Burton’s Sweet Hollow. That’s how much the band is on my mind.” Themsmoor.

Iron Mask – Master of Masters Review

Iron Mask – Master of Masters Review

“Twenty-twenty has been the year of ore. Iron ore, that is. We’ve seen it extracted from the earth, thrown into the blasting furnace, and molded into steel. From that steel, we’ve seen so many swords forged, that it’s practically raining the motherfuckers. There’s Ironsword and Megatron Sword, Possessed Steel and Blood Hails Steel – Steel Hails Fire, to name a few. And it won’t fucking end as long as Steel is fanning the furnace.” Mask ore die.