““Five overlength songs of Sludge-Doom-Metal.” This is the opening statement made of Slug Lord’s sophomore release, Transmutation, on their one sheet. As far as inspirational and enthusing promotional materials go, this resides somewhere next to “chlamydia – perhaps the most average of all sexually-transmitted infections” and “Volvo – the best example of Swedish culture.”” Prepare the salt baths!
“Sylosis have been one of the few bands bridging ‘popular,’ festival-headlining, metal with self-proclaimed high-brow or underground metal in recent years. You’re just as likely to encounter flat-cap toting hipster types as you are long-haired, neck-bearded ‘purists’ in the crowds of one of their gigs.” The state of modern metalcore isn’t great, but these blokes look to change all that, or distance themselves from it.
“A little confession: I chose to review the appallingly-titled 23 Acez sophomore effort in a bout of vindictive malice after grappling with a particularly hateful Spanish literature essay. I was pissed off and envisaged venting on a poor rock band just trying to make their way in the world.” We hate, because we care. Not about you, but other important stuff.
“A quick note to begin: Vircolac’s Codex Perfida has been released on cassette tape. No joke. Straight-faced. And for the moment, it’s the only available physical format.” That’s what you get when you sign to Kim Jong-Doom Records.
“Painting an elaborate portrait of the mysterious but beautiful Scottish Highlands, Aura is atmospheric folk metal of the kilt and haggis variety. Saor is the brainchild of Andy Marshall, ex-Falloch, and he saw great success with his début Roots.” The hills are alive with the sound of…SAOR!
“Paris is shit. Above all else, that is what the Paris-based Cowards wants to leave with the listener. Having missed this the first time round in 2012, Shooting Blanks & Pills has earned a well-deserved re-issue.” You might have missed this in 2012, and you may have missed the 2014 re-issue. Don’t be a two-time misser!
“Continuing the long and storied tradition of Finnish depressive music, Scapes is the brain-child of Olli Pirkkanen, and One: Unseen: One is his début under this name. His principle influences seem to be Katatonia and mid-era Anathema, sporting a moody and atmospheric ‘clean’ doom.'” Nobody does depression better than the Finns, but can it all be sad gold?
“Hailing all the way from sunny Russia, Estate are the proud bearers of good ol’ fashioned Europower. Fantasia, their début effort, is brimming with cheesy keys, up-tempo riffing and questionable English accents – the hallmarks of power greats such as Sonata Arctica and Helloween. Nonetheless, the musical term ‘fantasia’ implies a nonconformity to a specific style, and there are certainly a few curve balls here.” Starting with that Pan-tastic album cover!
“There are many things one can do in 20 minutes. Cook a frozen pizza. Watch an episode of an over-produced and unfunny American sitcom. Slump idly while contemplating the ultimate meaninglessness and futility of life. Now Bog Oak are here to stake their claim on these precious minutes with their short but sweet début EP.” From the darkest depths of the cranberry bog comes this blackened doom act. Mmmm, cranberries.
“As the season to be jolly fast approaches, Colorado’s Wayfarer is here to bequeath unto us morose darkness-dwellers a jovial record of festive classics… or so you may think from the Christmas wreath on the album artwork. To the dismay of my planned seasonal merriment, what I actually found is a stellar record of post-black metal with deathy undertones – think Agalloch but with Primordial added for the extremity. Wayfarer is a young group with big plans, and Children Of The Iron Age is their first full-length foray into the sphere-obsessed world of extreme metal.” I think our obsession with spheres on metal albums has finally come to a middle.
