2013: A wild Abbathian kitty appears, hellbent and determined to expose the world to bad jokes, hilarious perspectives, and most importantly, absolutely astonishingly great metal and metal-adjacent bands and performing artists. With his trusty minions by his side, this Blashyrkh-born-and-raised feline sets off into the realms of Angry Metal Guy with only one goal in mind: to spread the gospel of incredible music to the ears of those willing to listen. Hungry and passionate, and inspired by the likes of influential writers from the olden days of Metal Maniacs Magazine and Terrorizer, as well as trailblazers in the online world such as Metal Review/Last Rites, this cat marches forth, prepared for battle and the spoils of war to last for generations to come.
2023: A warehouse supervisor from Northeastern Florida, who’s squeezing what little free time he has in-between long work weeks with even longer hours, stares wearily and angrily at a blank WordPress screen. His eyes glaze over, knowing what he has to say but not how to go about it without constantly hitting that backspace key in a combined fit of worry and hesitation. Exhausted from work, and beaten down and heartbroken by what life has thrown his way over the last five years, this gentleman sits at his keyboard, glowing a soft blue like his favorite protagonist from his all-time favorite RPG,1 and prepares to type up a list of this year’s music that barely got him by, while also trying to come up with words to say about how he got here, how he’s really feeling, and everything surrounding those things without angering or disappointing others, knowing full well that it will be a fruitless endeavor because, as we all know, someone will pitch a bitchfit in the comments section. And with that, he sets forth on what is most likely the final thing he’ll write, at least for a good, long while.
These two wildly different characters are, as you can probably guess, the very same person. When I came onboard with Angry Metal Guy over a decade ago, the very idea of reviewing classic and new bands in my absolute favorite genre in the world, a genre that saved my pimply, awkward, teenage ass on many occasions, I jumped at the opportunity without hesitation. I wanted to inspire other metalheads like Alicia Morgan, Ula Gehret, Jeff Wagner, Mike Greenblatt, Greg Moffitt, S. Craig Zahler, Jordan Campbell, Dan Obstkrieg, and the late Katherine Ludwig did for me to hunt for, and write about, great metal music. In my eyes, Angry Metal Guy, not Decibel, was the closest in spirit to the late, great Metal Maniacs, and I wanted in on that. Throughout the last decade, not only did Angry Metal Guy the man take me under his wing, but so did Steel Druhm and Madam X, giving me insight and valuable tips on how to improve and leave my own mark without ever compromising my voice or my views. Also, I met some amazing people here, both readers and writers, that I wouldn’t have otherwise had I not written that review for Vattnet Viskar’s Sky Swallower. Seriously, the writers that are here now are some of the best people I have ever had the pleasure of working with, and they’re all amazing people with good hearts. I will not take their (or your) friendships and teamwork lightly. You’re all a second family to me, one I will cherish always, and I love you all. This is, more often than not, a thankless endeavor where you’re oftentimes been put through the wringer unjustly, so dealing with it at all to continue promoting bands should be commended.
So… what happened? To try to keep it brief as humanly possible, life happened. In 2018, I lost my older brother to a combination of personal neglect caused by depression, combined with a bacterial infection that lead to sepsis and a fatal heart attack. 2019, instead of taking time to grieve, I dove into work and writing. Quickly realizing that it was a mistake in doing so, I promised myself to not do that going forward. From 2020 through 2022, I would not be able to fulfill that promise, as my work exploded due to the pandemic, working myself past exhaustion to the point where I almost died from bacterial pneumonia in the tail end of 2021. This year alone, between losing one of my all-time favorite cats ever to cancer at an alarmingly young age, and having my partner lose his mom not even a full week later, and dealing with an estate that could have very well left us homeless, all combined to do a number on my physical and mental well-being to the point where my (now former) doctor was concerned due to the fact many of my newly-acquired symptoms I was experiencing this year mirrored those of colorectal cancer. Thankfully, it was all “just” the wonderful side effects of extreme burnout and being stressed the fuck out, but it made me realize that writing, and responding to people who are mad that I (checks notes) enjoyed things, needed to take a back seat in a big way.
But two other things set the decision in motion. One is the sorry state of metal sites and magazines, and how they go about covering things. I don’t believe in non-stop hype of mid-to-terrible bands,2 nor do I believe extraneously overwrought word salad to the point of sheer nonsense is the way to go,3 but at least they cover new bands that most would probably never have heard of otherwise. Your Shores of Nulls, your Darkhers, your Vainajas and the like. Sites like Metal Injection, on the other hand, can’t be fucked to do that, since it’s obviously more important to cover everyone’s favorite born-again chucklefuck and how he felt about trying to unalive his ex-wife via hitman/undercover cop, or Greg Kennelty shaming others because his favorite cilantro of the month is now popular. Ever since Albert Mudrian and Decibel decided it would be a splendid idea to not only give Burzum a fucking cover, but also a goddamn Decibel Hall of Fame induction in 2011, giving absolute pieces of shit a voice, or bands who already have a gross overabundance of coverage, is not only welcome, but seemingly encouraged at the expense of those who are battling to just be seen and heard. I don’t care about Sleep Token. I sure as shit don’t give an eighth of a fuck what Tim Lambesis’ shoulder routine is. That said, these days I’m just tickled pink that Kennelty has stopped rewriting negative reviews into way more positive ones, at least for the time being.
But most egregiously, there was something else that happened in the tail end of 2021 that ultimately sealed the deal, and it involved my second coming-out piece, and a certain Top Ten(ish) entry made in response to that (which got its own response). I’m not going into more detail about it out of respect to my fellow writers who also put in the hard work to move on from it, as everyone who’s been reading the site for a long time knows. All I can say is that, even with my best efforts to move on, it did a number on my creativity, humor, and most painfully my desire to write to the point where I feel like I’m merely going through the motions since it happened.
Which, to be frank, isn’t fair to me, it isn’t fair to anyone here writing for this great site, and it sure as shit isn’t fair to you. This year’s top ten is going to be the last thing I write here, at least for a long time, until I can find the passion, the hunger, and the drive to write again about the music I still love, even if portions of it want me gone, peacefully or not. I will continue to support my favorite bands. I will continue reading and chiming in to Angry Metal Guy. I will continue to quietly fight for those whose voices need to be heard. I’ll just be supporting from the sidelines from this point forward. If I find that passion again, things could be different. For now, though, the site needs people who are far hungrier than I am, and I need time to break away and rediscover my smile again.
I guess what I want to say is… thank you all, writers and readers, for the memories, the friendships, the great music, and the ability to give a worn-out warehouse supervisor a voice and an attempt at a teenage dream. Ten years is a long, long time, and I love you all for putting up with me for that long. In departing, I’ll quote Anaal Nathrakh’s anthem, “Endarkenment”:
“Take what small comfort there may be left;
seize what you love, and damn all the rest.”
Onward, now and forever…
#ish. Wormhole // Almost Human – Anything even remotely coming close to the wheelhouse of Voivod will get a near-Pavlovian response from me, and Wormhole’s skronky, atonal, and relentlessly heavy take on our favorite Québécois is undeniable. To quote our favorite resident sponge, “WOOOOOOOOORMHOOOOOOOOOLE!!!”
#10. Saturnus // The Storm Within – Denmark’s Saturnus is quickly joining up with the Peaceville Three in terms of being a doom/death institution, and their fifth album showcases just why that is. With crushing riffs, soaring leads by Indee Rehal-Sagoo (ex-Eye of Solitude), The Storm Within is a deadly catch, indeed.
#9. Sulphur Aeon // Seven Crowns and Seven Seals – Germanic blackened death metal prodigies Sulphur Aeon finally returned after a five-year absence with the remarkable Seven Crowns and Seven Seals, an album that many claim to be not as strong as their three prior releases… which is an awful lot like saying comparing a championship win against another from the same sports team in subsequent seasons. It’s still a winner, and head and shoulders above their contemporaries.
#6. Wreathe // The Land Is Not An Idle God – I miss Fall of Efrafa. I also love Morrow. Chances are, you do, too. Wreathe features key members of both bands, as well as Arboricidio, and it throws down just as hard and passionately as all three aforementioned bands. If you love emokrust, you are either onto this, or discovering it right the fuck now. You’re welcome!
#5. Fires in the Distance // Air Not Meant For Us – If you told me years ago that some of the best melodic doom/death would be from Connecticut, I would have laughed in your face to the point of an asthma attack. Yet, Fires in the Distance took what makes Insomnium and Omnium Gatherum4 and added their own unique embellishments to create a truly captivating album in Air Not Meant For Us. I await further installments.
#3. Wayfarer // American Gothic – Black metal should not go well with the Old West. Denver, Colorado’s Wayfarer flew against this very notion, and crafted not only their best album to date, but also an absorbing, engrossing classic that begs to be absorbed in full with your complete, utmost attention. Never has black metal felt or sounded so goddamn warm, like a freshly-killed outlaw baking in the hot Tucson sun.
#1. Godthrymm // Distortions – Reflections, the 2020 debut from Godthrymm, just barely missed the top spot that year, but still showed off how strong of a debut it was. Distortions improved what Reflections laid down, with meaty riffs, soaring leads, a fantastic rhythm section, and keyboardist Catherine Glencross’ angelic voice providing a complimentary accompaniment to her husband Hamish’s improved5 vocal delivery. This classic-doom-meets-classic-Pallbearer configuration landed my top spot as soon as I finished listening to it for the first time, and again, and again, and…
Biggest Disappointments o’ 2023
- The Passing of Kevin “Geordie” Walker – As a fledgling metalhead dipping his toes in the underground, one of the videos that helped nudge me into the direction of the more heavier, deeper waters was “Millennium,” the first single off of Pandemonium, the comeback album by legendary post-punk/industrial pioneers Killing Joke. So taken back by how vital, energetic, and direct it sounded, I bought Pandemonium, and was instantly blown away by how multi-faceted and talented guitarist Kevin “Geordie” Walker was. Slowly but surely, I would pull from different eras of Killing Joke’s discography, including both self-titleds, and besides Jaz Coleman’s frantic end-of-days proselytizing and gravel-coated voice, it was Walker’s hypnotically inventive guitar licks and powerful riffs that would become the soundtrack for many a workout session. Hearing of his passing in November was like losing a favorite uncle, and I know my listening habits would have changed drastically had I not been exposed to Walker or Killing Joke. Honour the fire forever, good chap.
- Aaron Lewis – Before I begin, this isn’t against hunting. If you’re at all carnivorous (like me), it’s a necessity in order to… y’know, live. But when everyone’s favorite whiner who bemoans how much of a bunch of snowflakes my generation and younger are while gleefully supplying the soundtrack of such snowflakery decides to use the bodies of 32 dead coyotes to promote his favorite businessman-turned-former President, you go from “nu-metal has-been” to “absolute piece of shit” in record time. And seeing as how nu-metal’s got no shortage of pieces of shit, that’s saying something. Speaking of pieces of shit…
- K.K. Downing – …dude, just fucking stop. Just. STOP. When I quit my last job acrimoniously, I didn’t try to win my job back while simultaneously taking a steaming shit on the owners. I left and never looked back. K.K., on the other hand, is special. I don’t know the full details, and I don’t want to know the full details, due to K.K. deciding to act like a crybaby and a perpetual victim, instead of behaving like he was one-half of Judas Priest’s highly influential guitar duo at one point. They even reached out to play the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame with the current line-up, to try to mend fences, and he still bitched up a storm. Be happy that you’ve got
Judas Priest at Homeyour namesake Dollar Tree rip-off band now. - The Sale and Butchering of Bandcamp – If you’ve known us for any length of time, you can probably guess that we all love Bandcamp around these parts. Easily the most artist-friendly music service out there, Bandcamp gave upcoming bands and labels, especially those who could use the reach, a voice and a chance, and even more so during Bandcamp Fridays, where the site’s fees were waived for all purchases. So of course Epic Games would buy it in March of last year, and then sell it to Songtradr, who would go on to lay off half of Bandcamp’s staff, including all those who were trying to unionize in order to protect their jobs. Was Bandcamp perfect? No, but I guarantee you most of your favorite new bands would have suffered if Bandcamp didn’t exist. To call this “heartbreaking” and “callous” would be a gross understatement. My heart goes out to those affected by the layoffs, and a giant, massive fuck you to Epic Games and Songtradr for fucking up an awesome thing.
Song o’ the Year
Godthrymm // “Devils” – Distortions possesses a number of songs that could easily fit into the #1 slot for Song o’ the Year.6 But, to me at least, “Devils” best exemplifies what the album’s all about: heavy riffing, somber melodies, enchanting vocals, and a slight tinge, no matter how small it might be, of hope. Also, the first half just kicks so much ass.
It’s been a wild, wild ride. Y’all be good.
