Colombian Metal

Exgenesis – Solve et Coagula [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

Exgenesis – Solve et Coagula [Things You Might Have Missed 2020]

“That glorious moment when you find a fucking cool record and you excitedly run off to tell your friends fellow captive writers about it. That awkward moment when one of them is like “oh yeah, I was telling everyone about this a few weeks back – wait, you were there, weren’t you?” And all you’re thinking is “die.” In this case, my sternest death stare was directed at the insufferable Cherd of Doom for it was he, not me, that first tooted the trumpet of Swedish-Colombian melodic doom/death dealers Exgenesis and their stunning full-length debut, Solve et Coagula.” Spiteballs and Coagula.

Horncrowned – Rex Exterminii (The Hand of the Opposer) Review

Horncrowned – Rex Exterminii (The Hand of the Opposer) Review

“To say “brutal black metal” is like being pummeled by razor blades. Black metal is not a internal bleeding type of genre, but one whose sinister tremolo, shrieks, and blastbeats imply scathing and sharp–a death by a thousand cuts. But if brutal is your cup of tea, intensity is the brand, fleshing out the bottom-end and pumping steroids into black metal clichés (if anyone has a picture of absolutely jacked Abbath, I would be much obliged). Basically Horncrowned.” Razor bath.

Lucifera – La Caceria De Brujas Review

Lucifera – La Caceria De Brujas Review

“My old computer science teacher once told our class that he liked Baja Blast Mountain Dew so much, he wished he could stick an IV in his arm and take it intravenously. Interestingly enough, that’s exactly the way I feel about blackened thrash metal. To me it’s like a drug: I don’t just want it, I fucking need it. It seems each continent produces its own unique strain and while I like Australia’s best, in recent years I’ve also come to enjoy the raw and uncompromising approach of South American bands like Invocation Spells and Witchtrap. Colombian duo Lucifera embody this same ethos.” Pick your poison.

Witchtrap – Trap the Witch Review

Witchtrap – Trap the Witch Review

“Look at that album title. Look at that art. Now that is a gimmick! Forgive my exuberance, but after only just overcoming the trauma-induced tinnitus from my previous attempts at thrash, Witchtrap prove that good things come to those who scour the promo sheet with a fine-toothed comb.” Nasty things come to those who dumpster dive.

Cóndor – Duin Review

Cóndor – Duin Review

“If there’s anything that can be gleamed about the giant web that is the world of heavy metal, it’s that you can always draw influence from outside of the genre’s comfort zone to provide a fresh flavor to the oftentimes stagnant scene. Whether it’s pulling from other sounds beyond metal, bringing in a new philosophical or religious slant, or simply injecting your culture into your sound, it’s pretty much guaranteed that, good or bad, you will be remembered.” Is Condor ready to be remembered?

Things You Might Have Missed 2013: Cóndor – Nadia

Things You Might Have Missed 2013: Cóndor – Nadia

“At first glance, this band’s name looks like that of a typical thrash metal band. This definitely has to do with my learning of a fairly unknown Norwegian thrash metal band with a nearly identical name a few months ago. But even then, just look at the form of the word “Cóndor” – two syllables, starts with ‘C’ and ends with ‘r’, and a mere six alphabets in total. This word simply has great potential to be crafted into a pointy, symmetrical logo with polish effect in the style of, say, Havok’s logo. Stereotypes, however, aren’t always accurate.” Happy Metal Guy is easily confused by band names and stereotypes, but he overcomes these disabilities to clue you in on some good doom/death you may have missed.