Danish Metal

Walking Rumor – Symbiosis Review

Walking Rumor – Symbiosis Review

“I’ve tried so hard to defend the potential inherent to all walks of musical life, nü-metal included, but in the end, it doesn’t even matter. Willful subjection to nü-metal was a self-destructive gamble at best, and Walking Rumor dealt me the unforgiving hand that I apparently deserved.” Muppet karma.

Freddy and the Phantoms – A Universe from Nothing Review

Freddy and the Phantoms – A Universe from Nothing Review

“I found myself wondering whether the members of Freddy and the Phantoms who aren’t the eponymous vocalist/keyboardist Frederick (Freddy) Schnoor write down “Phantom at Freddy and the Phantoms” on their resume. The promo material did not answer this pressing question, so I’ll happily assume they do. Also on the resume of any given Phantom is participation in one of 2015’s best rock records: Times of Division.” Rocking the stars.

Alkymist – Sanctuary Review

Alkymist – Sanctuary Review

Alkymist are here to enhance their own maturation of the progressive metal medium, imbuing a curious genre-bending identity to the extreme metal pot. Dragur are the undead – icy, chaotic, magical creatures risen from the dead to live a second life. They are the malevolence of alchemy and at the heart of this record. SanctuaryAlkymist‘s second full-length – is the sound of humanity in refuge, fighting against the twisted world of alchemy’s waste.” Magic against mankind.

Horned Almighty – To Fathom the Master’s Grand Design Review

Horned Almighty – To Fathom the Master’s Grand Design Review

“If you mopped up all the Darkthrone albums and wrung the juice out into a bucket, the grey slop collected would have the same general properties as To Fathom the Master’s Grand Design. Horned Almighty deliver their simplified black/death metal in a punky but neat package: ‘t’s crossed, ‘i’s dotted, Satans hailed.” Cleanup in aisle trve.

GoatHawkBuffalo – Come to Temple Review

GoatHawkBuffalo – Come to Temple Review

“It’s been quite a long time since I thought about ‘Portlandia,’ the I-have-to-assume wholly accurate depiction of life in Portland, Oregon. But reading the promo material for GoatHawkBuffalo’s full-length debut, I was put in mind of the particularly curious ‘We can pickle that’ sketch. Not because GoatHawkBuffalo are from Portland – the five-piece is based in Copenhagen, Denmark – but because of this statement from guitarist Asger Abel Sørensen, talking about how the band live-recorded Come to Temple but “subsequently recorded various crazy overdubs – we’ve had microphones in empty Jack Daniels’ bottles and buckets of water, we also ran a guitar signal through a pickle …”” Brine and brawn.

Denial of God – The Hallow Mass Review

Denial of God – The Hallow Mass Review

“He dribbles down the court, the clock winding down to an excruciating ten seconds. He fakes left and tears right, leaving his opponent stumbling. This is why the Orlando Magic drafted the Most High with their No. 1 pick, because with God, all things are possible⁠—like a deep playoff run.” I doubt even God can conjure that up this year.

Ethereal Kingdoms – Hollow Mirror Review

Ethereal Kingdoms – Hollow Mirror Review

“Every once in a while, I’m put in a position where I have to explain to some wide-eyed innocent how it could possibly be that I don’t care much for Nightwish. The only reason this happens, mind you, is because of the band’s undying popularity and colossal influence in their genre. My problem? I like symphonic in my metal. But I don’t like the band that everyone seems to copy to get there. So why would I pick up Hollow Mirror, the debut full-length from Danish band Ethereal Kingdom?” Wishing for the night.

BAEST – Venenum Review

BAEST – Venenum Review

“It is easy to underestimate Denmark’s contribution to death metal, especially in the face of America and Sweden. But from early days of infancy, through trembling years of youth, long murky middle-age and final hours long in the tooth. Denmark is the hundred names of terror, creature you love the least. Now picture its name before you and exorcise the BAEST.” Get in its belly!