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Glacial Tomb – Glacial Tomb Review

Glacial Tomb – Glacial Tomb Review

“When I first heard about Glacial Tomb, I was lead to believe they were death metal. Next time around, black metal. I saw the words “hardcore”  and “sludge” tossed around. When I finally sat down with their debut, I thought I’d settle the debate with my top-of-the-line reviewer ears. Well fuck those, and fuck me too, because Glacial Tomb will not be pigeonholed so neatly.” 20 genres in a 10 pound sack.

Unborn Generation – Vøid Review

Unborn Generation – Vøid Review

“The hallowed Angry Metal Spreadsheet Ov Promos was the first time I’d heard of Unborn, and thus I decided to leave my reservations at the door, enter the Vøid, and find out just what these Finns were all about. Does this sixth full-length grind n’ roll, bump n’ grind, or just stand around looking ominous in a hooded sweatshirt?” Roll out the grinder!

Daze of June – Heart of Silver Review

Daze of June – Heart of Silver Review

“Thank you for registering your interest for the Daze of JuneHeart of Silver Situational Response Kit. Here at Anodyne Metalcore Industries™ we pride ourselves on delivering products that are designed for any delicate occasion in need of a solution. Below you will find a number of scenarios that outline the efficacy of our product. With its polished delivery and muted dynamics, Daze of JuneHeart of Silver can be counted on when a calming, neutered experience is called for, no matter how fragile the circumstances. Be assured that this Danish-made item is professionally engineered and focus-tested to give you exactly what you expect with no surprises or unwanted excitement.” Fake Placid.

Bind Torture Kill – Viscères Review

Bind Torture Kill – Viscères Review

“This January, the Angry Metal Gods saw fit to bless us with multitudes of favor during what strange, countless aeons of headbanging have typically proven to be the darkest of times for trve believers, and we all say thank-ya. February it may be, but that doesn’t mean it’s time to say goodbye to Jørnuary tidings, and it’s definitely not time to stop saying thank-ya. By the deity-defying powers of Muppets, France, and procrastination, let us bask in the revitalizing glory of 2018’s expectations-shattering induction for just a little longer. Friends, meet Viscères, the second full-length by Bind Torture Kill.” Fashionably late and brvtal.

Death on Fire – Witch Hunter Review

Death on Fire – Witch Hunter Review

Death on Fire wants you to know that Witch Hunter isn’t your grandpa’s melodeath. If that Playboy-for-Pyramid-Head cover doesn’t convince you, one spin through its prickly hollow will. There will be none of that slickly-produced astronaut cheese metal you babies lap up so greedily, not today. The music of one-man band Tim Kenefic is ugly and coarse, like clawing at a scab that will never heal.” Pick your poison, pick your scabs.

AngryMetalGuy.com’s Aggregated Top 10(ish) of 2017: The List to End All Lists

AngryMetalGuy.com’s Aggregated Top 10(ish) of 2017: The List to End All Lists

“¡Chicos! It is arrived. The list for which you have all been waiting. Listurnalia has run its course for 2017, and the semi-final list is upon us. This year, there were a ton of different albums mentioned, and let’s just say for the record that any record that was mentioned that isn’t on my (AMG) list is wrong. But, alas, other people also work here or the blog wouldn’t be written. So, in honor of all these lesser mortals who think they’re special, I present: AngryMetalGuy.com’s Meta List. Also known as…” Lists of things once listed.