Nickelback

Full House Brew Crew – Me Against You Review

Full House Brew Crew – Me Against You Review

“I’m gonna level with all you. I own a Godsmack album. OK, fuck… I own two. But it wasn’t my fault. Where (and when) I grew up, the internet was barely a thing and censorship was real. And I don’t mean the Denver/Snider/Zappa type of censoring (though that existed, too). In my religious hometown, music is sold in the next town over, at Walmart. Which meant there weren’t many options. It was a time when possessing censored versions of Korn, Staind, Godsmack, Slipknot, and (fuck me, again) Nickelback records was rebellious.” The Devil’s photograph!

Parasite Inc. – Dead and Alive Review

Parasite Inc. – Dead and Alive Review

“Bands like Hypocrisy and Dark Tranquillity were like gateway drugs for me. I remember getting heavy into the style about a decade ago and then it seemed to run its course. And, as most of my favorite bands carry on with run-of-the-mill material, while others—like Soilwork, Arch Enemy, and In Flames—continue to bore me to fucking death, it’s become even more clear that I’ve fallen away from the genre. So, in hopes of rekindling some of those flames, I grabbed Parasite Inc.‘s Dead and Alive. What the hell was I thinking?” The Doc has worms.

Hyvmine – Earthquake Review

Hyvmine – Earthquake Review

“I don’t often jump into a review without even a smidgen prior knowledge of a band or genre. Usually, armed with a fine-toothed comb and a cuppa, I’ll spend hours entering a band from the promo list into ol’ Encyclopaedia Metallum researching them. Making Sophie’s choice is usually tough — I never want to do a band a disservice by not researching or placing myself confidently within their musical world. However, all the promo for the next month was already selfishly taken by my fellow staff members and so, feeling like a lonely Zoidberg in ‘Why Must I Be a Crustacean in Love?’ I settled for the Los Angeles-based progressive hard rock and metal band Hyvmine (a purposeful misspelling of hive-mind).” NU LA Land.

Hinder – The Reign Review

Hinder – The Reign Review

Hinder. Depending on your familiarity with modern rock radio, you’re either asking who the hell they are or why in Jørn’s name we’re reviewing them. For the former, the term “Nickelback-lite” is all you need to know. For the latter, it all started when Madam X presented The Reign as “good hard rock,” inciting a discussion about who was familiar with these Oklahoma natives. With a sideways glance and a quivering lower lip, I stepped forward and sheepishly announced to the group: ‘I… I have known this band.'” Confessions, interventions and hard rock.

Adrenaline Mob – We the People Review

Adrenaline Mob – We the People Review

“We the People, in order to form a more perfect union, certainly never planned for Sir Russell Allen to continue his New York/New Jersey nu-metal groove project Adrenaline Mob this long. In fact, with this third album inbound, things are bordering on a violation of listeners’ basic rights and freedoms. I’ve covered their previous outings of throwback hard rock and nu-metal, yet I remain at a loss why Mr. Allen is so enamored with this numb-skull style of pablum made infamous by Disturbed, Godsmack and Nickelback.” Careers in waste management.

Adrenaline Mob – Men of Honor Review

Adrenaline Mob – Men of Honor Review

“Umm, I’ll be honest with you. I really wasn’t looking forward to this album. As much as I worship Sir Russell Allen (Symphony X, Allen/Lande) and his golden pipes of steel, I really hate this hard rock/nu-metal side project he has going on with friends. Their Omerta debut was a painfully shallow, cringe-inducing foray into Disturbed styled nu-metal mixed with grungy barroom rock and it really didn’t work, even with Allen on vocals and Little Lord Mike Portnoy (ex-Dream Theater, Liquid Tension Experiment) on drums.” The Mob is back again. Do they rule yet?

Audrey Horne – Audrey Horne Review

Audrey Horne – Audrey Horne Review

It’s been a long time since a sort of standard modern rock or traditional metal band really showed off anything that this Angry Metal Guy appreciated. For the most part, modern rock has been rehashed BS and overrated post-Seattle scene leftovers. The bands that have tried to convert their sounds (see: the remnants of Guns N’ Roses meets STP or Europe’s latest incarnation) have really failed at it because the sound is, at its root, boring as hell. Rehashing rock again with thicker guitar tone and a vocalist who will never live up to the classics is pretty much a good way to guarantee that your vocalist buddy goes to rehab, but not much more. Whatever happened to Buckcherry again? Oh right. Flash in the effing pan.