“A man walks into a bar after a long day at work. A mushroom sits beside him, a real fun guy. The man orders a Stella Artois from the bartender and asks for it in a two-ounce glass. Perplexed, the bartender knocks eighty percent off the price and does what he is asked. “Bottoms up” says the man to the mushroom, who toasts to feces and personal growth in return. The man sets down the empty glass roughly, which gets the bartender’s attention. “That,” the man says to the bartender, “was some terrible whiskey.” This is how most metalcore reviews read by writers who never could stand the genre to begin with. They want it to be something it’s not, and when it inevitably fails, it faces the wrath of the mighty pen.” Pull up a toadstool.
Italian Metal
Fleshgod Apocalypse – Veleno Review
“Fleshgod Apocalypse—known affectionately at the AMG offices as “Death Metal Rhapsody of Fire”—had a meteoric rise from its humble beginnings on 2009’s innovative Oracles. Though these Italian death metallers started on a Candlelight/Willtowtip, Nuclear Blast wasted no time elevating them to underground metal’s biggest stage. That pickup resulted in a larger budget, bigger productions and an evolution beyond the band’s death metal quartet status.” One of the brightest stars in the death metal universe is back with its fifth album. Will this be the one that makes us all go “Uuaaaaaauuuu”?
Stormlord – Far Review
“Every once a while we at AMG hack and slash each other for promos. In this case, I slice-and-diced one Very Messy Individual™ (Holdeneye) in the name of a symphonic death metal band by the name of Stormlord. You see, symphonic death and symphonic black metal seem to be on the upswing this year.” Storming with malice.
John, the Void – III – Adversa Review
“During the Great N00b Off, I told myself that, should I one day be given unchaperoned access to the promo bin, I absolutely would not choose a band purely on the basis of its name. I would do my research and make an informed decision. So, following my first foray into the promo bin sans Steel Druhm, take a bow John, the Void, a band I chose purely for its name.” What’s in a name?
Nibiru – Salbrox Review
“I’m naturally drawn to tags that promise something slow and heavy, so when I saw “blackened doom” next to the name Nibiru, you’d forgive me if visions of another Indian danced in my head. In reality, Salbrox, the sixth full length by these Italians, would be better described as spoken word noise/drone metal. This curve ball may have knocked some reviewers off balance, but bitch, I went to art school.” School is way out.
Whiskey Ritual – Black Metal Ultras Review
“Duality is a part of life. Man and God. Heaven and Hell. Filet mignon and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos. There’s a time and a place for putting on your best suit and giving a polished presentation to your boss, and there’s a time and a place for slamming Michelob Ultras in your underwear while listening to Impaled Nazarene’s discography in reverse order. Since this is a band called Whiskey Ritual, I’m sure you’ve already figured out which side of the spectrum they fall on. Here’s a hint: my pants are already off.” Pants off, dance is also off.
Cosmic Putrefaction – At the Threshold of the Greatest Chasm Review
“There are two routes to success in death metal, either through brutal immediacy or boundary pushing creativity; while most bands understand this, few know how to blaze a trail down either path. The aptly named The Clearing Path deftly navigated the latter route two years ago with their sophomore record Water Between Firmament and the Realm of Hyperborea, a dizzyingly unique and atmospheric take on death metal that I still listen to and think about often. Thus, when I learned about a new, more traditional death metal project from Gabrielle Gramaglia, The Clearing Path’s sole member, my curiosity immediately skyrocketed.” Chasm spasms.
Atlas Pain – Tales of a Pathfinder Review
“2017 brought with it many things. Chief among them was the debut record by Italy’s Atlas Pain. Featuring speedy, bombastic folk metal, it was enjoyable and stuck with me more than its 3.0 may suggest. The passing of two years has brought a sophomore release called Tales of a Pathfinder at a make-or-break stage in any band’s career. Atlas Pain have approached this challenge with all the bright colors, zany attitude and symphonic trimmings which I enjoyed on the first go around and I’m delighted to write that their Italian charm has not been lost.” Can’t let it go.
Necromutilator – Black Blood Aggression Review
“A spindly man enters the room and takes the chair in front of the casting agent. A gaudy yellow jumper is tied around his neck and he holds himself with an air of unearned confidence.” You won’t believe what happens next!
Falaise – A Place I Don’t Belong To Review
“Stagnation is an ugly thing. Waters, once teeming with life, become rancid without a flow of movement. It’s also been said that once we stop learning, we should effectively be dead. If we retread familiar soundscapes, eat the same damn foods all the time, and generally never leave that comfortable, insular bubble that we willingly trap ourselves in on a day-to-day basis, are we really growing? Have we gotten so used to where we are, as individuals and as a society, that eventual growth is not only impossible, but also not desirable?” Glazed with shoegaze.