2022

Mass Worship – Portal Tombs Review

By Steel Druhm on February 4, 2022 in Reviews, Black Metal, Death Metal, Grind, Sludge Metal, 42 comments

“Not being an especially spiritual bloke, I only took a flyer on Mass Worship’s sophomore platter Portal Tombs because they were tagged “death metal” in our greasy promo sump. Well, the promo sump sits on a greasy throne of greasy lies! These Swedish sadists are NOT death metal, and it’s actually a challenge to explain what they are. I can tell you Portal Tombs is a ridiculously heavy slab of extreme metal designed to smother and obliterate all light and joy from this cursed world. Their style rumbles through death, black, sludge, doom and grind genres like a nuclear-powered killdozer, and the band is more than happy to beat you with any and all tools they come across during their bloody rampage.” Portals and tombs but no cake at all.

Mystic Circle – Mystic Circle Review

By Doom_et_Al on February 4, 2022 in Reviews, Black Metal, 22 comments

“In the 2010 Will Ferrell/Mark Wahlburg movie, The Other Guys, we get a glimpse of what it’s like to be the unglamorous backup to the main act. Ferrell and Wahlburg play second fiddle to Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne Johnson’s badass, heroic cops; the hard-working foil to the flashy heroes, who get far less respect and attention than they deserve. I imagine, when not getting up to the usual metal shenanigans, that the creators of Mystic Circle can relate to The Other Guys. Formed way back in 1992, Mystic Circle has, in various iterations, released seven respected, if not adored, studio albums before calling it a day in 2007, having never reached the heights of some of their contemporaries.” Satan in the circle.

The Last Ten Seconds of Life – The Last Ten Seconds of Life Review

By Saunders on February 3, 2022 in Reviews, Deathcore, Nu Metal, 50 comments

“Part of the Unique Leader staple, The Last Ten Seconds of Life drop their self-titled album on the masses, bringing a nu-metal meets deathcore hybrid to the table. On closer inspection, the Pennsylvanian crew has been alive and kicking for over a decade, releasing a steady stream of albums, culminating in this sixth LP. Combining two of the more divisive metal styles of the post-millennium era takes balls.” Get your balls out of the Hall.

Vorga – Striving Toward Oblivion Review

By Kenstrosity on February 3, 2022 in Reviews, Black Metal, Melodic Black Metal, 96 comments

“Space. Black metal. It’s a match made in heaven! People have been writing black metal albums about space for decades, and it doesn’t seem to matter how oversaturated that specific niche gets. Metalheads eat it up. I eat it up. Space is such a massive thing anyway that the possibilities are quite literally infinite to our comparatively minuscule imaginations, so in that way it makes sense that there’s always a new invader breaching the bulkheads. Enter Vorga and their debut full-length, Striving toward Oblivion.” Space inwaders.

Deathcult – Of Soil Unearthed Review

By Felagund on February 3, 2022 in Reviews, Death Metal, 21 comments

“The second I saw Deathcult’s Of Soil Unearthed in the promo sump, I knew I had to have it. Not because I’d heard their first album, 2010’s Beast of Faith, but because that name is death metal distilled; the kind of brutish, on-the-nose moniker that conjures pleasant thoughts of Guyana in 1978. The kind of name which whispers sweet nothings to the reptilian part of my brain that produces monosyllabic grunts whenever I hear a guttural vocal, a crunchy riff, or a vile lyric or two.” Well trod earth, unearthed.

Kissin’ Dynamite – Not the End of the Road Review

By Huck N Roll on February 2, 2022 in Reviews, Glam Metal, Hair Metal, Heavy Metal, 15 comments

“For well over 30 years – well, since the genre came into being, really, any time I’ve needed a pick-me-up I’ve been able to safely turn to the lighter side of metal. Call it hair, glam, bubblegum metal, whatever you like, the music is based on one thing: having a great time. Always highlighted by excellent guitarists and augmented with massive singalong choruses, just dropping an old Black ‘N Blue or Dirty Looks album on the turntable washes away all of the day’s grime. Germany’s Kissin’ Dynamite feel the same way about glam metal as I do, and for six albums they demonstrated their adoration of the hair days with strong outings.” Bomb licking, cock rocking.

Saxon – Carpe Diem Review

By Steel Druhm on February 2, 2022 in Reviews, Heavy Metal, NWOBHM, 90 comments

“Saxon was there with Elrond 3000 years ago when Sauron fell. Saxon has more albums than some of you have years on Earth. Saxon will still be releasing albums long after you are dust crumbs. These are truisms metal fans must accept before moving on and living a happy and productive existence. Now Saxon’s 23rd fucking album is here, and it’s titled, Carpe Diem. And what can you expect to find when you follow instructions and seize the day?” Elder Godz and day hoarding.

Obsidian Sea – Pathos Review

By Carcharodon on February 2, 2022 in Reviews, Alt-Metal, Psychedelic Rock, 18 comments

“Pathos is the fourth full-length from Bulgarian trio Obsidian Sea, and their second for current home, Ripple Music. It is also not at all what I was expecting. Obsidian Sea was unknown to me until I picked this up for review but, given the band name, I was expecting some dark and stormy prog, perhaps infused with elements of doom, sludge or even some epic post-metal. That is not what I got, however.” Choppy waters.

Opensight – Mondo Fiction Review

By GardensTale on February 1, 2022 in Reviews, Heavy Metal, Progressive Metal, 13 comments

“In the case of Mondo Fiction, you get… detective metal? If we’re going to conflate movie and music genres, this description is easily the most apt for Opensight’s quirky brand of metal. Additionally, using more established musical genres is a surprisingly difficult undertaking. Broadly speaking, the album mixes elements of heavy metal, progressive metal, alternative metal and smidges of the cabaretesque and surf rock. Yes, surf rock.” Mystery is on the menu.

Abhoria – Abhoria Review

By Holdeneye on February 1, 2022 in Reviews, Black Metal, 30 comments

“Picking a new promo is an exciting occasion because there’s no telling what the results may be. A few years back, I wandered far outside of my wheelhouse to snag a progressive blackened death metal release by a band called Ashen Horde. I had no prior knowledge of the band whatsoever, and I was enthralled by what I heard. But I had no idea that the great music was just the tip of the iceberg of what I would gain from the experience. Ashen Horde guitarist and main songwriter Trevor Portz reached out to me shortly after the album’s release, leading to a fun interview with both Portz and Ashen Horde vocalist Stevie Boiser, and Portz and I have maintained frequent contact ever since. Early on, he told me about a more straightforward black metal project that he was working on called Abhoria.” Abhor the horde.