2.5

Superjoint – Caught up in the Gears of Application Review

By Dr. Fisting on November 15, 2016 in 2016, American Metal, Hardcore, Housecore records, Reviews, Hardcore, 33 comments

“Longtime metal fans may remember Superjoint Ritual as the nadir of Philip Aneslmo’s career, if they remember it at all. The band’s general concept — mid-’80s hardcore filtered through the depravity of the New Orleans metal scene — was an interesting one, and the resulting album, 2002’s Use Once and Destroy, was a satisfying blast of spite. 12 years later, Anselmo and guitarist Jimmy Bower (also of Down) have decided to resurrect the project, with half of the original lineup and half of the band name.” Phil is back and his gears are grinding.

Hammer King – King is Rising Review

By Huck N Roll on November 9, 2016 in 2016, Cruz Del Sur, German Metal, Power Metal, Reviews, Power Metal, 71 comments

“This is my twentieth review for AMG. In honor of such a fine achievement, the nobility at AMG World Headquarters have bestowed upon me a fine destrier, so I can prance through the office valiantly proclaiming my fealty. Well, not really, but I was given the newest output from power-metal wannabes Hammer King, King is Rising. Which, if played loud enough, is practically the same thing.” The Hammer King has a skull tank.

Noveria – Forsaken Review

By GardensTale on November 7, 2016 in 2016, Italian Metal, Power Metal, Reviews, Scarlet Records, Power Metal, Progressive Metal, 14 comments

“The mainstream view of metal is that it’s either scary or ridiculous. Which, I suppose, makes us all a bunch of clowns, both in how society views us and in our low-key terrorization of the collective subconscious. But you have to admit that a lot of metal really is a bit idiotic, with grown men playing Viking metal, stringing together the foulest descriptions of gore, or, in the case of power metal, screaming about flaming dragons in the skies.” Those dragons are en fuego!

Crippled Black Phoenix – Bronze Review

By Huck N Roll on November 6, 2016 in 2016, British Metal, Post-metal, Progressive Metal, Reviews, Season of Mist, Stoner Rock, Swedish Metal, Progressive Metal, Stoner Metal, 56 comments

“In honor of our esteemed Dr. A.N. Grier’s misplaced love for baseball (and the fact that the season has finally come to a merciful conclusion), I present a baseball analogy for Crippled Black Phoenix. CBP are like big-league sluggers: most of the time they strike out, but every few games they wallop one into the second deck of left field.” Swiiiiing, batter.

Hierophant – Mass Grave Review

By Grymm on November 4, 2016 in 2016, Death Metal, Doom Metal, Italian Metal, Reviews, Season of Mist, Sludge, Death Metal, Doom Metal, Sludge Metal, 20 comments

“when I receive a promo for a band (in this case, Italy’s Hierophant), and the one-sheet that accompanies their fourth album, Mass Graves, states rather emphatically, “No pink unicorns here,” and they still don’t supply us with a promo pic? Prepare for battle, son.” Doom death in the Age of Pink.

Quartz – Fear No Evil Review

By Lord Lucan on October 31, 2016 in 2016, English Metal, Heavy Metal, High Roller Records, NWOBHM, Reviews, Heavy Metal, NWOBHM, 31 comments

“Stylistically Quartz play traditional heavy metal in the vein of Judas Priest and Saxon, and Fear No Evil has a distinctively old school flavor. Everything about it, from the chord progressions and melodies to the warm, uncomplicated production sounds as though it was pulled straight from the early ‘80s, lending it a reassuringly authentic quality, and first impressions are positive.” Retro, Shaggy!

Deranged – Struck By A Murderous Siege Review

By Al Kikuras on October 30, 2016 in 2016, Agonia Records, Death Metal, Grind, Reviews, Swedish Metal, Death Metal, 29 comments

“Cannibal Corpse opened the gates for the pornogrind bukakke blast to come (sp) in the mid 1990s, they were and are a death metal band. Granted, Germany’s Gut was wallowing in depraved and murksome waters for a few years, but they always had more in common with a band like the Meat Shits dashed with a touch of Macabre than anything remotely malevolent. It was with Deranged’s debut, 1995’s Rated X, that the menace Cannibal Corpse lost appearing found a new, grindier and even more perverse host.” Glove up, peeps, this one is venal and vile (and sticky).

Debackliner – Debackliner Review

By Dr. A.N. Grier on October 22, 2016 in 2016, French Metal, Heavy Metal, Pitch Black Records, Power Metal, Reviews, Heavy Metal, Power Metal, 10 comments

“Debackliner is the second French group in a week for me. The first was the excellent Ars Moriendi—a one-man, black metal act focused on the Frenchy weirdness of bands like Spektr and Blut aus Nord. But, Debackliner is something else. It’s not a one-man band, it’s not black metal, and it’s not anything you were expecting.” Is there a French connection?

Aeternitas – House of Usher Review

By Dr. Wvrm on October 21, 2016 in 2016, German Metal, Gothic Metal, Massacre Records, Reviews, Symphonic Metal, Gothic Metal, Symphonic Metal, 30 comments

“When Steel Druhm pitched my weekly Hot Pocket and Fanta allotment down the Well of Rookie Souls, he shouted something about it being “ultra mega super cheesy.” I thought he meant my pepperoni-infused beauties, but it turns out he was talking about the cheese-nuke of an assignment he dropped on my work slab.” Loosen the jazz hands.

Ewigheim – Schlaflieder Review

By Grymm on October 21, 2016 in 2016, German Metal, Gothic Metal, Reviews, Rock, Gothic Metal, Rock, 14 comments

“The old adage “Never judge a book by its cover” holds firm here. Long story short, I picked Germany’s Ewigheim for review from our list of promos because a certain half-man, half-gorilla who shall forever remain nameless listed them as “black metal” due to the album cover, logo, and the fact that he glanced over the German one-sheet. Hankering for some kvlt blackness of the tr00est order, I grabbed their sixth full-length, Schlaflieder, and was met with… something totally not black metal.” Mistakes were made.