“There’s no doubt that this is one fucked up world. And to add insult to injury, Autograph has a new album. I mean, I wouldn’t want to say glam metal is irrelevant these days, but it is. And one of its pioneers is unwilling to die—trying to hold on to what it has (“Turn Up the Radio”) and hasn’t (everything else) contributed to this world.” This IS your father’s metal.
“Hard rock not-quites Buckcherry were never really that important a band, releasing one popular song that was vulgar, catchy, and immensely irritating. I was surprised, then, when frontman Josh Todd formed Josh Todd and the Conflict (hereafter JTC) and released their debut record Year of the Tiger.” Conflicted.
“If you’re anything like me, first of all, clean your room, and second, you’re probably sick to death of bands aping the retro-doom sound making its rounds among the underground. The music’s gotta be something special for me to pay attention and give it my time. Thankfully, Demon Eye’s Prophecies and Lies is that something special.” Demon cleaner, room neatener.
“Cast your minds back to a time when metal music was not cool. Nay, indeed, a time when metal was anathema to all that was considered to be “chic” and “in.” A time when your favorite bands were actually encouraged by the music industry to play slower, cut their hair, and write sensitive lyrics about their childhoods. Yes, this unfortunately really happened. Our semi-irregular feature “90s Metal Weirdness” focuses on albums released between 1992 and 2001 and which we all probably would rather forget. But in the service of publicly shaming the musicians involved, we have pushed forward.” Industrial grade W.A.S.P. sounds good on paper, right?
“Japan’s Barbatos is apparently a side project of Yasuyuki, vocalist/bassist for punk-metal combo Abigail. While the two bands are similar to the point of redundancy, Barbatos has been far less prolific, releasing only four full-lengths (and a bunch of 7″ splits) during a 15-year career. Straight Metal War is their first LP in nearly a decade, and it’s on Hell’s Headbangers — a label whose resistance to modernity is rivaled only by the Amish — so you KNOW it’s gonna be some old-school shit.” Boobs!
“You know how Kurt Cobain killed Hair Metal? Of course you know; we’ve been through this already. He didn’t. Yes folks, it’s time for your second dose of hair metal in under a month! You see, while AMG has been distracted dealing with Steel Druhm’s incessant efforts to inject more Jorn onto the site by any means necessary, I’ve launched my own elaborately coiffured campaign to restyle Angry Metal Guy into the far more fabulous Hair Metal Guy.” Jorn in the U.S.A.!
“You know how Kurt Cobain killed Hair Metal? Apparently he didn’t manage to finish the job. It’s taken a couple of decades, but the recent surge of sleaze shows that the blow delivered by Kurt’s Fender Jaguar wasn’t, in fact, fatal.” If Cobain couldn’t kill sleazy cock rock, no one can!
Okay, I’m just going to come right out and say it. Black metal as a genre has stagnated and become very boring. While that inevitably happens to every musical genre (power metal has had it bad for about six years), with this particular style it seems far more pronounced and chronic. Although I’ve appreciated the scene and sound from its earliest origins (as a Bathory fan in the 80’s) and essentially grown up alongside the genre, the past year has seen things run into the creative wall and slowly slide into a morass of tedium and lethargy. Be it the symphonic or the raw and primitive, very few bands are doing anything new, interesting or compelling (even the new Agalloch felt samey and safe). While some solid albums surfaced in 2011,they feel increasingly rare and even those offered little in the way of innovation or originality. Obviously, of all the subgenres of metal, black metal is the most rigid, inflexible and laden with rules and expectations of scene orthodoxy. Throw a saxophone solo on a power metal album, it may be daring and ballsy. Try that on a black metal album and you’ll be burned in effigy across Norway (and parts of New York).
