Reviews

Record reviews

Lorna Shore – Psalms Review

By Kronos on June 24, 2015 in 2015, American Metal, Deathcore, Density Records, Reviews, Deathcore, 19 comments

“Lorna Shore: if you’re not a big fan of deathcore (and let’s be honest, you probably aren’t) you either have never heard of the band, or only know them because of that fucking cat video. That changes today. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but these guys have something special going on – or at least they seemed to after 2012’s Bone Kingdom EP. They’re definitely core – the singer’s earlobes could be used to bundle asparagus and those blast beats sure as hell aren’t acoustic – yet also, well, really good.” But aren’t we supposed to hate deathcore?

To/Die/For – Cult Review

By Steel Druhm on June 23, 2015 in 2015, Finnish Metal, Gothic Metal, Massacre Records, Reviews, 23 comments

“I’m going out on an emo limb here, but Finland’s To/Die/For had a run of three albums where they released some of the best goth metal the world ever saw. From Jaded to Wounds Wide Open they were completely unfuckable with for slick, uber hooky sad boy rock, and to this day I’m still all over those platters like a beast. Then came the endless line up conundrums and inner turmoil and the band broke up and reformed several times…and it looked like the end was nigh for the reigning kings of Finnish gloom and my little black heart was both achy and breaky.” It’s time to open your scar diaries once again.

District 97 – In Vaults Review

By Roquentin on June 23, 2015 in 2015, American Metal, Progressive Metal, Reviews, The Laser's Edge, Progressive Metal, 27 comments

“Ah yes, progressive metal/rock, the genre with one of the worst palatable-to-garbage ratios and a catalyst that often makes gifted musicians churn out forgettable pieces of music that serve no purpose other than to act as vessels of said instrumental talents. Yes, that is a platitude that everyone’s aware of at this point, but it also rings true very often. Then again, when prog’s done well, it can be really good.” Ready the Noodle Monitor!

Dew-Scented – Intermination Review

By Saunders on June 22, 2015 in 2015, German Metal, Metal Blade, Reviews, Thrash Metal, Thrash Metal, 12 comments

“Apart from boasting the wimpiest band name this side of Raunchy, Germany’s Dew-Scented have built a substantial body of work since releasing their debut album Immortale back in 1996. Drawing influence from classic German thrash bloodlines and manipulating them into their own deathlier take on modern thrash, the band has plugged away through an almost comical amount of line-up changes to arrive at their tenth full-length album, Intermination.” Should you do the Dew?

Goatsnake – Black Age Blues Review

By Steel Druhm on June 21, 2015 in 2015, American Metal, Doom Metal, Reviews, Southern Lord, Stoner Rock, Doom Metal, 21 comments

“Goatsnake was originally formed by veterans of seminal doom act The Obsessed, and though they’ve rattled around since 1996, they haven’t been the most prolific crew in the doomiverse. With only two albums and a few EPs to their credit and their last full-length dropping way back in 2000, they would already be relegated to a footnote in the Big Book of Doom if not for how righteous early works like Goatsnake Vol. I were, and the sheer number of bands ripping off their sound.” Goat and snake…unite!

Nekromanteion – Cosmic Horrors EP Review

By El Cuervo on June 21, 2015 in 2015, Black Metal, Death Metal, Iron Bonehead Productions, Reviews, Black Metal, Death Metal, 5 comments

“Cosmic Horrors is a raw and rudimentary 12-minute EP by Nekromanteion. A short blast of Bolivian blackened death, with a brand which doesn’t exactly squeal innovation. But that’s what some bands are for: fleshing out over-saturated genres which are in dire need of more newcomers contributing their feces to the tidal wave of metal excrement. That’s not to say that Nekromanteion is bad, but there is certainly is a lot of crap floating out there and they merely attempt to execute the bog-standard very well. Is it possible that they can rise above the murky deluge like a surfer-dude Nergal?” Come and ride the poo tide!

Thornesbreed – GTRD Review

By Diabolus in Muzaka on June 20, 2015 in 2015, Art of Propaganda, Black Metal, Death Metal, German Metal, Reviews, Black Metal, Death Metal, 11 comments

“To pilfer a phrase from the revered postmodern philosopher Christopher B. Bridges, “there’s something wrong if you can’t stand still.” If his words are to be taken at face value, Germany’s Thornesbreed must have sensed a problem in their sound. Consisting of competent but unexciting death metal, their 2003 debut The Splendour of the Repellent was followed up eight years later in 2011 by the 273.15 Degrees Below Freezing EP, which can, for the sake of expediency, be described as “Profanatica but not as good.” 2015 sees the band releasing their second full-length in the form of the enigmatically titled GTRD, marking another step in the band’s perpetual musical wanderings.” Wandering, meandering and change for change’s sake. Is that a recipe for success?

Pro-Pain – Voice of Rebellion Review

By Steel Druhm on June 19, 2015 in 2015, American Metal, Hardcore, Reviews, SPV Records, Thrash Metal, Heavy Metal, 27 comments

“FYI: New York crossover is once again in da house. Yes, the Gothemic institution of Pro-Pain is poised to release another angry screed against the powers that be, crying out from their scummy concrete jungles with a back alley trash dumpster sincerity that cannot be denied. Since forming in the early 90s from the wreckage of hardcore legends Crumbsuckers, Gary Meskill piloted this thrash/punk/hardcore hybrid along a very consistent course, mixing seething rage with simplistic but accessible writing as the band addressed all sorts of current events and socio-political themes.” Does this make you feel mad… brah?

Damnation Angels – The Valiant Fire Review

By Dr. A.N. Grier on June 19, 2015 in 2015, English Metal, Massacre Records, Power Metal, Reviews, Symphonic Metal, Power Metal, Symphonic Metal, 22 comments

“Do a quick Google (or should I say YouTube) search of vocalist PelleK. If you are not familiar with this name, you will discover that he loves selfies, modeled shots, filming himself singing other people’s shit, and acting in Norwegian TV shows. Though his solo work in Pellek is enough to make me wanna set myself on fire (which includes sixteen cover albums of EVERYTHING from Pokemon and Power Rangers themes to ’90s sitcom themes), his four-octave range is simply incredible. So, were Damnation Angels damnable fools for snatching him up for 2013’s Bringer of Light and 2015’s The Valiant Fire?” You know you want to hear those Pokémon themes.

High on Fire – Luminiferous Review

By Grymm on June 18, 2015 in 2015, American Metal, Doom Metal, eOne Music, Reviews, Sludge, Doom Metal, Sludge Metal, Stoner Metal, 29 comments

“There are certain things in life you just come to depend on and expect. Hollywood will try to recreate your favorite movies, and they will all suck. People will place themselves above the proletariat to assume a level of faux superiority. We will all die, some more gloriously than others. And, without fail, California’s High on Fire will pummel the bejeebus out of you with every record they release.” Get your bejeebus in order.