“As a youthful cheeky-chappy, I missed death metal the first time round. The wonders of Google have permitted me to research that which I lacked, thus purging myself of the vim and vibrancy with which I was once characterized. I now regularly murder my family and desecrate their burial chambers in the name of such legends as Entombed and Dismember, a sentiment obviously shared by Stockholm’s latest recruit: Lik.” It’s Throwback Friday (again)!
“Like every reviewer on the face of the planet, my first thought when seeing the title of The Black Dahlia Murder’s latest full length was Wayne’s World: “Shitty Beatles? Are they any good?” “They suck.” “Then it’s not just a clever name.” To be honest, in the case of Detroit’s finest, I had a hard time believing that this was any kind of In Flames-esque “naming this record based on its meaning for the band” logic. That’s not really TBDM’s style, and well, let’s be honest, even at the very worst these guys have always put out very good music that I consistently get into fights over.” And said fisticuffs shall continue for the foreseeable future.
“Not many people know Costin Chioreanu musician. Most metalheads know Costin Chioreanu artist. Since the artist appears to have quite the workload, it’s not surprising that the musician is an “ex” member of most his musical endeavors. Lucky for us, the musician is back with a debut full-length filled with unsettling avant-garde black metal.” Sounds suspiciously like another strange case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde!
“Genre-defining albums don’t come along every day – or every year – so when they do pop up, it’s important to take note of them for future generations like me. When The Gallery saw release in 1995, so many moons ago, I was not really prepared to appreciate its artistry due to a preoccupation with jaundice.” Prepare for some yellow journalism.
“Russian tech-death machine Defect Designer had an interesting couple of years since their 2009 debut, Wax. Bassist, guitarist & vocalist Dmitry Soukhinin decided to relocate from the Russian city of Novosibirsk to the much-easier-to-pronounce Olso, Norway, taking everything but his band with him. To help round out his recording line-up, Dmitry enlisted members of SepticFlesh, Trollfest, and Cryptopsy to aid in recording what would become the oddly spelled Ageing Accelerator. Now, you would think that having people from the aforementioned bands perform for your record would have the masses salivating for progressive tech-deathy goodness, and in words on a screen, it does look inviting, doesn’t it?” So where’s all the drool?
“Electing to join the I Am the Wooden Object Club before The Table Himself even did, I Am the Trireme’s name can be described as “I am the Phoenician, ancient Greek, or Roman naval vessel with three rows of oars.” Luckily they didn’t pick that one, but in the spirit of needlessly long names, they’ve called their first full-length Gnosis: Never Follow the Light. We know right off the bat that these guys can produce pretentious sounding names for things, but that’s not what we’re here for; we’re here to see what they bring to the Hetfield musically.” We are also the table. And the oar bench.
“Hailing from the Czech Republic, Pandemia is a bit like the death metal equivalent of Everybody Loves Raymond; it’s been around a while appeared alongside plenty of important things, but you’ve never met anyone who really knows much about it. Maybe you’ve run across it once and stuck around for a few minutes, but something else caught your attention pretty quickly.” But everybody LOVES Raymond! War metal, maybe not so much these days.
“Honestly, I haven’t been excited for a new release from The Crown in a long time. For one, the quality of their releases has slowly declined since their epic Hell Is Here debut back in 1999.” These cats have an uneven history with more than their share of lineup issues, but they’re back and we have opinions (and some of them are silly).
“As someone who writes music reviews, I take pride in being able to craft together a 450-550 word essay on why you should pick up an album, or why you should avoid it entirely. Keeping the reader on their tippy-toes while painting a vivid picture for your eyes and ears to digest is a great joy of mine. However, as the world aged by a year this week, I too have added another year to my existence. In doing so, I’ve realized that there comes a time where you have to dispense with the hyperbolic bullshit and just call it as it is.” Such a comment is rarely the prelude to something positive.
“The Year of Our Angry Overlord 2014 has been a crazy ride. One year ago this week I was finishing up one of the most stressful terms of my entire life, and this year has been a rush of teaching prep, reading, researching, and “OMFG.” You have certainly noticed that AngryMetalGuy.com has been pretty short one Angry Metal Guy in 2014, and that’s been tough for everyone involved I’m sure.” In this massive post Angry Metal Guy reflects on 2014, ranks a bunch of records, and is waiting prepared with his flamethrower for when the whine hits the fan.
